Something I have long hated has been the self proclaimed nerd/geek (SPNG). This breed has been around for a while. The problem with this group of people is that they truly think and believe that they are special, unique, and better than everyone else. Here are some things I hate about the SPNG:
- The SPNG hates people and things in the mainstream and latches onto obscure music, television, or movies until they hear someone they don't like mention them then disposes of them because they are too mainstream.
- The SPNG constantly flaunts their geek cred by mentioning how amazing they are for liking something that is slightly less mainstream.
- The SPNG does not see the humor in the fact that they like an "obscure" TV show with only 5,000,000 viewers instead of a mainstream show with 10,000,000 viewers.
- The SPNG will ocassionally throw in a line from Flight of the Conchords and nod knowingly to his friends as if you didn't know what they were talking about.
- The SPNG may or may not pretend to like Battlestar Galactica a little more than they actually do to preserve their nerd cred.
- The SPNG definitely pretends to like Johnathan Coulton much more than they actually do.
- The SPNG claims that they've never actually heard of American Idol even though that is impossible.
- The SPNG actually thinks a quote from Star Wars is obscure even though there isn't a single line in any of the six movies that is not instantly recognizable to 85% of all males from the age of 25 to 45.
- The SPNG loves to self-aggrandize about how beautiful their life/culture is.
- The SPNG writes lenghty emails to television networks begging them not to cancel their favorite show. This email includes a point-by-point analysis of how the show actually has much more viewers and fans than the network realizes and takes it for granted that the network has not actually done the math on whether canceling the show will be beneficial to their bottom line. Apparently TV networks just like to cancel hugely popular and lucrative shows just to make geeks sad.
- The SPNG either just discovered xkcd or discovered it years ago and now hates it because other SPNGs have discovered it.
- The Famous SPNG writes books and does interviews where they talk about how special their geek culture is while other SPNGs fawn over said books or interviews.
- The SPNG thinks that maybe, one day, one of their online petitions will be successful.
- The SPNG thinks that they are better than other people because their tastes are more refined and original. They think these other people are either pedestrian or snobbish. The SPNG legitimately does not see the irony in this.
I feel much better now. That's been bugging me for a while.
It seems this blog post is not entirely stable! It's business time!