[J m HofMarN]

it's better to punish someone as a kid then let them get punished later on in a much harsher extreme...

the odd non damaging slap, spank, wooden spoon, towl flick, etc. is better then pissing off some guy 20 years later who shoots you in the face, or smashes your legs, or glasses you, etc.

I don't quite think you got the point of CN2s (sounds like a news network) post. Corporal punishment only helps to sow the seeds of violence in later life. The entire American system of justice (this includes most parenting, as well as the actual justice system) seems often to be based more on punishment than on actually teaching people a lesson. Smacking a kid for doing something wrong sends the message "Don't get caught next time" Telling them why what they did was wrong firmly sends the message "What I did was wrong" There are plenty of perfectly well behaved children who were never hit. And any phsycologist will tell you that a child who gets hit is more likely to hit people later in life. Same as a child whos father abuses their mother is more likely to abuse women.

I'm not saying that all parents who hit their kids are bad parents. If it's done in a loving spirit than that's probably fine. Even a parent who dosn't hit their kids can still be horribly abusive. However I think in a world full of school shootings and republican propaghanda and the backstreet boys and plastic safety palygrounds it would be a good idea to give kids every possible advantage. Thus my belief that under no circumstance should someone hit their children.

[Just your average movie goer]

However I think in a world full of school shootings and republican propaganda and the backstreet boys and plastic safety playgrounds it would be a good idea to give kids every possible advantage.

J M, this would have to be one of the most profound things I have ever read.

[jyd]

I think my daddy spanked me once...and maybe my mom dragged me to my room by my hair a couple times, but my parents i dont know how they did it..made me feel really awful by just letting me know what i did and show me how disappointed/angry they were. i respect them alot for the way i was raised and hope i can follow that with my children

[Just your average movie goer]

That's true actually. If you respect the person you've disappointed, you feel terrible.

[barend]

Hof...

a great post and a good point...
and suprise you, i agree!

i guess i didn't make my initial point about hitting clear.

there is an age bracket that veries with individuals... an early part of life before reasoning can in any way be be effective. and there is a difference between 'hitting' and 'spanking'
i'm against hitting or facial slapping. that's just violence. the bottom spank which is as harfull as giving someone a 'pink belly' and slap on the hand, carefully exicuted is also non damaging...

but realistically you cannot dliver an essay to a 4 year old about the complexities of sociopolititical co-existence.

when your a child all you know is pain is bad. and if you affiliate that with something... all the better. i.e putting your hand on the stove = bad, disobeying mom and dad = bad.

put this form of punishment should be finished with at an early stage...
on average, by the time a child is 6, they should be able to understand enough of what your saying (if yoou provide them with it) to no longer warrent such measures.

it's part of the progress...

but in saying all that. i think spanking should not be delivered while the parent is still angry.

i always found that my father was smart enough to know this...
and good god, waiting for it alone in my room was the was the worst part. it would give me time to think about it.

sometimes he'd come in, and i'd already be crying, and he wouldn'd do it... because he knew i'd learnt.

that probalby sounds horrible to some of you, but it was done intelligently... and effectivley.