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Zero Punctuation - The Witcher

#16 User is offline   Sylv Icon

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Posted 24 January 2008 - 04:31 PM

"Pufferfish"...god damn. Beautiful.

I'd heard that the load times for The Witcher were absolutely atrocious (Thanks, Neverwinter Nights 2 engine). I'm surprised that wasn't mentioned in the review. Was that patched up to the point where it wasn't so bad?
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#17 User is offline   El Presedente Icon

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Posted 24 January 2008 - 07:09 PM

I'm sure I'm not the only one who hopes Intro Sequence Theatre will become a regular feature.
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#18 User is offline   Sniffles Icon

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Posted 24 January 2008 - 07:12 PM

"Dear Yahtzee,

Since you are having trouble with the extremely complex game the Witcher.

I decided to make you a quick help guide:
Controls:
-Use the OTS(Over the Shoulder camera),it's the best view of the three options
-W goes foward
-S Goes Backwards
-D Goes Right
-A Goes Left
-Left Click to Attack(hold LMB then click again when the sword icon lights up for a combo attack)
-Right Click to use Signs
-Use number keys to change Sign(Igni is the best Sign)
-Use Z,X,C to change styles(Strong for slow guys with armor,fast for quick guys like archers,group for swarms of bad guys)
-If you keep on missing you need to switch styles from Strong to Fast

As you can see the Witcher puts most flight sims to shame complexity wise.

Quests
-You need to read books to be able to harvest creature parts and complete the bounty hunting quests
-Press J to bring up Journal. You can then select a quest and make it active to have the mini-map point you to the correct quest location

In conclusion Yahtzee your Witcher review was the worst one you have ever done for the Escapist magazine.

Some of your points like the alchemy system being terrible were on the the money but the rest of your review was disconnected from reality. A few reviews back you harped about how Bioshock was a easy,no challenge,dumbed down console game. Finally a PC exclusive RPG comes along and you start crying about how complex and hard to learn it is.

In the Witcher you don't have to control a whole party of whiny characters or even learn how to effectively use a billion different spells like in Baldur's Gate. You seem to think that the Witcher is a complex,hard to learn game. The Witcher is hardly a complex RPG in my humble opinion.

If you are going to whine about complex,hard to learn PC games then please whine about games that deserve it like Hearts of Iron or one of those crazy military flight sims where you have to learn a few hundred different button combos."

from the YCS board on SomethingAwful. Not saying I agree or not, just posting it here.
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#19 User is offline   Dannysaysnoo Icon

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Posted 24 January 2008 - 07:22 PM

How dare you talk to your dad like that.

I think he means a balance between ease of use and complexity. Deus Ex had this right on the ball, and nothing can compare to it.
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#20 User is offline   AdamM Icon

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Posted 24 January 2008 - 07:31 PM

What the hell is this? "writes the back page column for PC Gamer"? Why is he writing for the yanks and not us?
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#21 User is offline   Casual Icon

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Posted 24 January 2008 - 07:35 PM

QUOTE (AdamM @ Jan 25 2008, 12:31 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
What the hell is this? "writes the back page column for PC Gamer"? Why is he writing for the yanks and not us?


Because they pay him to?
QUOTE (arien @ Jun 29 2008, 03:34 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
So this baby, while still inside its mother, murdered his twin brother and STOLE HIS PENIS.

That is one badass baby.

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#22 User is offline   Lecca Icon

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Posted 24 January 2008 - 07:48 PM

QUOTE (Sylv @ Jan 25 2008, 07:31 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
"Pufferfish"...god damn. Beautiful.

I'd heard that the load times for The Witcher were absolutely atrocious (Thanks, Neverwinter Nights 2 engine). I'm surprised that wasn't mentioned in the review. Was that patched up to the point where it wasn't so bad?


Actually I thought it was based on the first NWN engine. Well that CERTAINLY explains the load times. I remember running races with the other people in my Lan group to see who could load quicker. Usually it was my father being that he had the cash to burn on getting the parts for a good system. Yes - I play RPGs with my father, in fact, he was the reason why I even played the witcher, I was happy just going along going through the HUGE amount of games I need to catch up due to my final Uni year last year.

EDIT: No actually it is the first NWN engine, Aurora. NWN2's Engine is called "The Electron Engine".

QUOTE (AdamM @ Jan 25 2008, 10:31 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
What the hell is this? "writes the back page column for PC Gamer"? Why is he writing for the yanks and not us?


Well he used to write articles for Hyper (In fact, I found his stuff the best, I remember the first time reading on of his articles thinking "Hey, This guys writes similar to Yahtzee, I wonder who - ahhh! Love for Yatzee grows....") But it seems some short time after I stopped subscribing 2 and a half years ago, the magazine went stupid. The editor left and the issues after became a shambling corpse unsure what it was doing. I looked at a copy the other day and it looked NOTHING like the magazine it had been 2 years previous the only thing that remained similar was the cover.
Maybe with the stupid they decided they didn't need the ultra-witty Yahtzee.

This post has been edited by Lecca: 24 January 2008 - 08:02 PM

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#23 User is offline   SimeSublime Icon

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Posted 24 January 2008 - 11:19 PM

QUOTE (Dannysaysnoo @ Jan 25 2008, 09:22 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I think he means a balance between ease of use and complexity. Deus Ex had this right on the ball, and nothing can compare to it.

I beg to differ. I remember putting all my skill points into whatever you need to use a sniper rifle, being given a rifle with an entire 3 bullets, and still having the site fly all over the place. Then I got killed by an invincible robot thing, because apparently I was supposed to take a different pistol, despite being given no warning of the fact. Deus Ex is about as fra from ease of use as I can imagine.
The Green Knight, SimeSublime the Puffinesque, liker of chips and hunter of gnomes.
JM's official press secretary, scientific advisor, diplomat and apparent antagonist?
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#24 User is offline   avenging Icon

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Posted 25 January 2008 - 12:59 AM

i haven't played rpgs in a while (mostly because i hate playing with other people unless they are actually team oriented)so the last time i played an actual rpg was baldur's gate. will be playing the bard's tale soon crappy interface but looks funny. how would the witcher compare story wise to these games? is it a grind until you level like diablo or is it like wow where you rn around looking for ways to kill crap?
When there are no heroes where will we turn?

i post without caps to annoy sniffles. kisses ;)
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#25 User is offline   SimeSublime Icon

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Posted 25 January 2008 - 05:12 AM

QUOTE (avenging @ Jan 25 2008, 02:59 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
i haven't played rpgs in a while (mostly because i hate playing with other people unless they are actually team oriented)...

Actually, that's the reason I play RPG's. Best single player games around.
QUOTE (avenging @ Jan 25 2008, 02:59 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
...so the last time i played an actual rpg was baldur's gate. will be playing the bard's tale soon crappy interface but looks funny. how would the witcher compare story wise to these games? is it a grind until you level like diablo or is it like wow where you rn around looking for ways to kill crap?

Neither. The game puts very little emphasis on leveling up, and there is bugger all equipment to speak off. And how you can even divide RPG's into Diablo-likes and WoW-likes is beyond me. They're both the same waste of time.
The Witcher is all about the story, setting and atmosphere. It's about interacting with the characters, getting enmeshed in the political intrigue, and eventually reshaping the nation. Killing monsters and looting treasure is more of a side thing.
The Green Knight, SimeSublime the Puffinesque, liker of chips and hunter of gnomes.
JM's official press secretary, scientific advisor, diplomat and apparent antagonist?
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#26 User is offline   Miez Icon

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Posted 25 January 2008 - 07:57 AM

QUOTE (El Presedente @ Jan 25 2008, 01:09 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I'm sure I'm not the only one who hopes Intro Sequence Theatre will become a regular feature.


I liked it a lot. But it did sound A LOT like Dr. Ashen. Odd...
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#27 User is offline   avenging Icon

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Posted 25 January 2008 - 09:00 AM

QUOTE (SimeSublime @ Jan 25 2008, 05:12 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Actually, that's the reason I play RPG's. Best single player games around.

Neither. The game puts very little emphasis on leveling up, and there is bugger all equipment to speak off. And how you can even divide RPG's into Diablo-likes and WoW-likes is beyond me. They're both the same waste of time.
The Witcher is all about the story, setting and atmosphere. It's about interacting with the characters, getting enmeshed in the political intrigue, and eventually reshaping the nation. Killing monsters and looting treasure is more of a side thing.

huh you make it sounds worth my time to try out. thanks... the reason i use those two is because those are the few i have had a chance to play. i am insanely busy usually so i can only play in chunks usually and i was in the army for a bit, which pays like crap, so i had a stint without a computer for a few years... but i've gotten off topic. thanks for the clarification.
When there are no heroes where will we turn?

i post without caps to annoy sniffles. kisses ;)
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