Written by: Chefelf
Edited by: Jacques
AT-ATs, space slugs, the swamps of Dagobah, epic lightsaber duels. It's The Empire Strikes Back, the best chapter of the Star Wars trilogy and it's finally here on DVD. But don't rejoice yet, this is not your daddy's Star Wars. You will notice slight changes, some irrelevant, others just plain stupid.
To help you better understand these changes I have compiled this list to present, explain and rate them based on a made up scale that I think quantifies their importance/stupidity.
Special thanks go to:
- civilian_number_two for sending me the Star Wars Special Edition DVDs! Without his genorosity none of this nitpicking would have been possible.
- Jacques for continuing to be the editor for all of this nonsense. Without his help, these articles would be littered with typos, grammatical errors and grievous punctuation errors even more grievous than General Grievous! And that's pretty grievous!
- Everyone who participates in The Star Wars Fan Convention Forums. All of your continued enthusiasm for these lists is what keeps me writing them. Thanks for all your kind words and criticisms. Thanks to all the bashers and gushers who are more alike than they'd like to think.
The Lando Calrissian Scale of Greatness
This scale is used to rate changes in the Special Edition DVDs that are positive and actually enhance the quality of the movie and the viewing experience. The more Landos, the better the change.
The Wampa Scale of Insignificance
This scale is used to rate changes that don't really affect the movies in a postive or a negative way. Things that make you go, "Ehh." The more Wampas, the less signifcant the change.
The CGI Jabba Scale of Special Edition Stupidity
This scale is used to rate the Special Edition changes that make the viewer wish computers were never invented.
The Flying R2-D2 Scale of Sequel to Prequel Inconsistency
This scale is used to rate a scene from the original Star Wars release that is now ruined because of the prequel trilogy.
The Chewbacca's Tarzan Yell Scale of Changes that Should Have Been Made
This scale measures flaws in the original movie. Normally these flaws could be left alone but it makes you wonder why Lucas didn't fix these things while he was fiddling around with computers anyway.
The Yaddle Scale of Prequel Stupidity
On to Reasons to Hate Star Wars:
This scale is used to rate changes in the DVDs that slap you across the face to remind you that the prequels exist. The more Yaddles, the worse the change.
Episode V: A New Hope "Special Edition"...
Back to Chefelf's Main Star Wars Page
Reasons to Hate Star Wars
Episode I (78 Reasons to Hate!)
Episode II (64+ Reasons to Hate!)
Episode III (91 Reasons to Hate!)
The Nitpicker's Guide to Star Wars
Episode IV: Special Edition (12 Nitpicks!)
Episode V: Special Edition (8 Nitpicks!)
Episode VI: Special Edition (17 Nitpicks!)