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Does it bother any of you that in the PT Yoda's grammar problems fade in and out
and when it's messed up it sounds stupid?

In ESB for example,

"Help you I can."
"Told you I did, reckless is he."
"Luminous beings are we."
"In, you must go!"
"Powerful Jedi was he."
"Judge me by my size do you?"

Basically, short, concise sentences only.

Then in the PT

We have such gems like
"Around the survivors a perimiter create!"
" Not if anything to say about it, I have"
"How feel you?"


It just sounds weird. It's like, when the object isn't a person, he's supposed to speak normally.

Evidence from ESB:
"A Jedi's strength flows from the force" The subject is the Jedi and the object is the force. Thus requiring no effed up grammar.

"Yes, to Obiwan you listen!" or fixed up: "Yes, (you) listen to Obiwan!"

Here the subject is you and the object is Obiwan, a person.


So let's fix the offending quotes: If we absoultly have to have effed up Yoda grammar then we can change how he delivers the line without changing the meaning.

"Around the survivors a perimiter create!" - Actually I'm not sure Yoda should be barking orders to clone troopers at all, but what the hell. (and by the way, survivors isn't the object of the sentence, perimiter is. Survivors is the compliment) "Protect the survivors we must. Rescue the Jedi we shall!"
"Not if anything to say about it, I have" - "Wrong, you are! Stop you I shall."
"How feel you?" Yoda can sense how people feel so he should not be asking this dumb question. "How do you feel? Afraid are you?"

I'm sure that there may be other times when Yoda's speech is all reversed when people are not the objects, even in ESB but you have to admit that the speech in the PT just sounds silly.

I was watching the battle on DVD in slow motion, and I noticed something. What looks like Luke hitting Vader's right shoulder actually is something different. Luke actually misses the shoulder, and hits Vader's neck. In one frame, the lightsaber actually looks like it's going through his neck. I guess it all happens so fast that when you see the pyro going off on Vader's shoulder, you assume that Luke hit the shoulder.

In the prequels there are all these battle droids running around and R2 can fly and do acrobatics. In the later ones there are no battle droids (except the ig88?) and R2 can't do all that fancy stuff.

Well, after the Emperor consolidates power and has his clone army, it only makes sense that he'd pass legislation making it so battle droids and all droid technology is halted in all areas of the Empire, to cement his power. All droids with certain capabilities have to be dumbed down.

In the years before the rebellion is organized, to avoid detection they have to comply to the legislation with all their droids.


Yay!

Now what the hell happened to Yoda the superball?

It's pretty common knowledge that the PM sucks. No one knows what is going on unless they watch it three or four times. After watching it more than that I began to like some of the less annoying parts. It certainly is possible to salvage the movie if you just edit a few places here and there. Here's what I would do (in order of importance)...

1. The obviously obvious thing to do is cut down Jar Jar Binks' screen time. All unnecessary scenes with Jar Jar, we can delete. "The Phantom Edit" already did that for us, from what I've heard.

2. Delete all scenes with Darth Sidious. While saavy Star Wars fans will still be suspicious of Palpatine because his name is Palpatine and because he's played by Ian McD, and because he's maneuvered himself to be chancelor of the senate... If we never actually SEE Darth Sidious, then in the end, we don't know if Palpatine is Sidious yet. Neither do we know if Darth Maul was the master or the apprentice. The Trade Federation guys talk enough among themselves when they aren't in front of Sidious' hologram that the audience can infer that it wasn't exactly their idea to blockade Naboo. This way, the "menace" really does seem "phantom"... especially to people who haven't seen the next trilogy. And "Phantom Enough" to the rest of us.

3. Edit the Darth Maul vs Obi-Wan Kenobi fight. Have Obi-Wan run through the open force field barrier, then immediately get knocked into the pit. (We can all laugh at Obi-Wan's inexperience, and Obi-Wan learns that reacting in anger and emotion isn't how to win battles... or something.) After he jumps out of the pit, quickly cut to the scenes that were originally right after he came through the forcefield. (So that there is a fight after he jumps out) Then after fighting for a while, cut back to him cutting Maul in half. This way, Darth Maul gets to go down fighting instead of looking like a big doofus.

4. In the opening crawl, change the "Trade Federation" to "The Nemoidians" or something. Nafta doesn't have an army. Neither does Asean, neither does the EU. It's unnecessary to have names like Trade Federation, Banking Clan, and Techno Union. Those are stupid. Call them by whatever their home-world is named. Otherwise we should be calling Tatooine the "Spice Cartel" or the "Gambling Faction" Also change every instance where the people say "Trade Federation" to whatever you said in the crawl.

5. Change the title. Phantom Menace is dumb. "Invisible Evil", "Hidden Darkness" or even "The Undetectable Bad Guy" sound better than Phantom Menace.

6. "Fear leads to hate, hate leads to anger, anger leads to suffering. I sense much fear in you." It appears that for two sentences Yoda's grammar has been fixed. Un fix it somehow, but don't make it sound dumb like "Around the survivors a perimiter create!"

There you have it... zzz