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Culinary Memories Thursday, May 27, 2004

#1 User is offline   Chefelf Icon

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Posted 27 May 2004 - 07:39 PM

Today I had to do a lot more cooking than I normally do. This found me in the kitchen cutting up everyone's favorite tuber to make some roasted potatoes for a catered event. When I was thinking about what I wanted to do with them I first went into the walk-in cooler and saw an abundance of fresh rosemary. "That would be delightful," I thought. Then, at that moment, I was cast back to my earliest days of culinary school, as a freshman. The simple thought of rosemary roasted potatoes made me remember this:
    My Culinary Memory

    There was a class at culinary school called "Quantity Food Prep". This "class" was a thinly veiled excuse to get students to work for free in the university dining hall, cooking for and serving its students. This class required us to be at school at 9:00 AM for three days, then 2:00 PM for three days, then 4:00 AM for three days. It was a hellish, quick, rotating schedule that had you feeling jet-lagged for nine days. Before throwing us into the kitchen each morning or afternoon they had the nerve to sit us in a classroom for 35 minutes to have a "lecture". We would then have a "debriefing" type lecture at the end of "class".

    All in all it was a pretty stupid class but if you wanted a degree you had to do it. Who could argue with that?

    One day the chef instructor (who looked a lot like Mike Judge's character in Office Space) told me to make roasted potatoes for lunch. I had worked in a kitchen for a few years so I was more than capable of doing this, but having working in the kitchen I found these instructions to be a little vague. So I asked for clarification. "Chef, what would you like on those potatoes?"

    "Anything you want," he answered.

    "Anything?" I asked. I had learned that it was always best to get a confirmation of any direct order from a chef.

    "Yes, anything you want," he said, then walked away.

    I had previously worked at a restaurant and I figured I would make my roasted potatoes the same way we made them there, as they were pretty delicious and our customers really enjoyed them. So I got together some garlic, rosemary, salt and pepper and tossed the potatoes in a little oil before putting them into the roasting pan.

    While I was pouring them into the pan the kitchen sous chef, Butch, came by. Butch was the grumpiest person I may have ever met in my life. He was a short, stocky guy with droopy eyes that seemed to hate life and everyone in his way. Butch was a senior at the school who must've made some wrong decisions or shaken the wrong hands and had somehow landed himself in the regretful position as the sous chef of quantity food preparations for student dining. He wasn't thrilled about it and I didn't blame him.

    "What are you doing?" Butch asked.

    "I'm making roasted potatoes," I explained.

    He stuck his pudgy sausage fingers into the potatoes and picked a potato up to examine it. "Who told you to put rosemary in the potatoes?"

    "No one," I said.

    "Then why did you do it?" He asked.

    "Because the chef told me I could put anything I wanted into them."

    "Even rosemary?"

    "Well, I assumed that rosemary fell under the classification of 'everything'," I told him.

    Butch threw the potato into the pan, gave me the hairy eyeball and then left. I continued to ready the potatoes when Butch returned with the chef.

    "What are you doing?" The chef asked, Butch lurking behind him like some sort of loyal dog.

    "I'm making roasted potatoes," I answered, again, beginning to get sick of their questions.

    "Why did you put rosemary in them?" The chef asked.

    "Because you said to put whatever I wanted in them," I told him.

    The chef shook his head. "Not rosemary, okay? Rosemary is no good for roasted potatoes. The little pieces get really hard. It's like eating toothpicks."

    "Yeah," Butch echoed behind him. "Tooth picks."

    "Ahh, I see." I didn't see. "I'm sorry. It won't happen again."

    "Okay," the chef said. "Just don't let it happen again."

    "I won't, chef. You can count on that."

That story, in my humble opinion, sums up the foodservice industry better than anything else. Better than the reality TV show The Restaurant, better than a tell-all book by Anthony Bourdain. That story is what working in the foodservice industry -- and a lot of other industries I'm sure -- is like. If the guys in my class weren't ready for the industry before that class, they certainly were after that.

Dealing with one knuckleheaded, wishy-washy chef after another is an every day affair in the foodservice industry. I'm just afraid that now I'm the knucklehead.
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#2 User is offline   mrRobinson Icon

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Posted 27 May 2004 - 10:17 PM

When i read a story, I like to visualize as most do. You run into a slight problem when something is mentioned in the story that you can't visualize. In my case this was the rosemary. So when you saw an "abundance of fresh rosemary" I was picturing tulips or something growing in this walk-in cooler and it made me laugh.
So funny story.

And if you are that knucklehead now then good for you.
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#3 User is offline   Jordan Icon

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Posted 28 May 2004 - 06:38 AM

That was a great story Chef, it reminds me of your other classics (The batting cage for example)

I hope you don't become one of those hard asses. I worked in a kitchen for 2 summers in a row. It was hell. The sous chef hated me, the chef hated everyone, and the waiters hated the whole kitchen staff.

After work we would drink together once and awhile. But during working hours it was just hell, pure stress. One time Chef toss a ladel across the kitchen and it hit me square in the face. Another time the sous chef forced me in a headlock (he thought it would be funny) and shoved my head in dirty dish water.

The greatest day I had at work was when Mike, the sous Chef, was on everyones ass about preparing stuff for this banquet. He was yelling and screaming, telling us to hurray and not toddle.

He yelled at me for ripping at least 50 prawn tails of the prawn. (need to have those on for holding) But then when it came down to the crunch, Mike was the screw up. He was roasting some beef and he decided to put the croutons in with the beef so they could cook too. Well, Mike forgot about the croutons, they were charred. This of course created a smoke in the oven, thick black smoke, that ended up making the outside of the beef taste like shit.

Mike freaked out. He started swearing and a vain popped out of his forehead and neck. Chef grabbed him, stuck his head under cold water and threw Mike outside and said "call it it day and come back tommorrow".

Those are the things you never forget.

This post has been edited by Jordan: 28 May 2004 - 06:38 AM

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#4 User is offline   Heccubus Icon

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Posted 28 May 2004 - 11:40 AM

Sounds like someone just needs to kick the shit out of the sous chef...
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Posted 28 May 2004 - 03:56 PM

This guy Butch must have really been a toady to the chef. Sort of reminds me of that little creature that use to always be around Jabba the Hut, kissing his large butt. Come to think of it the name Butch seems to imply toadyism. What a dumb nickname.
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Posted 28 May 2004 - 05:55 PM

QUOTE (mrRobinson @ May 27 2004, 10:17 PM)
When i read a story, I like to visualize as most do. You run into a slight problem when something is mentioned in the story that you can't visualize. In my case this was the rosemary. So when you saw an "abundance of fresh rosemary" I was picturing tulips or something growing in this walk-in cooler and it made me laugh.

Sadly they are not flowers (though they do flower at certain times of the year). You can read ALL about rosemary here.

QUOTE
This guy Butch must have really been a toady to the chef. Sort of reminds me of that little creature that use to always be around Jabba the Hut, kissing his large butt.


He wasn't quite like Salacious P. Crumb but rather more like a Gamorrean Guard. Still a creature in Jabba's Palace. Fancy that!

Side note: In doing the Google search for Salacious P. Crumb look what came up: http://www.google.co...p+crumb&spell=1

My "Reasons to Hate Star Wars: Episode I" article! The people running the Star Wars databank must hate that!
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Posted 28 May 2004 - 10:36 PM

Salacious Crumb must not be the mega-star I once thought. Now I'm disillusioned.


I mean, moreso.
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