This honestly has to be one of the worst posts on this entire site, and that's saying something...
That's a pretty bold statement. I've written heaps of worse stuff.
However, Spielbergs movies are utter crap. I'll qoute myself from another post...
"What I can't stomach is Spielberg himself, and his absolutely dreadful and overbearing cinematic style. He and his actors are far too aware of the camera. All movements are stilted and over choreographed. He has zero sense of subtlety. He reuses the same same scenes from film to film. He treats his audiences like idiots and expects us to love him for it. He loves "scenes" at the expense of story, plot, pacing, and logic. He loves cuteness over substance. It is not so much that this film is worse than any of his others, it's just that the cuteness has finally worn off for most people. This film is shit. But, on the other hand, so was Last Crusade, for exactly the same reasons, and E.T., and The Goonies, and Hook, and Saving Private Ryan, and Jurassic Park, and Empire of the Sun, and most of the rest of them. They were always shit."
I suppose at this stage you would like some sort of example? Let's take everybody's favorite film, "ET".
I notice you dislike films
made for 8-year olds with no brain or common sense
Is ET supposed to make any kind of sense, or is it merely a collection of random scenes assembled by Steven Spielberg to manipulate the simple minded? I certainly lacks logic from start to finish, on both the grand scale and the small.
If those ETs are trying to be inconspicuous while stealing earth's trees, why have they got all their lights blazing during their clandestine mission to deforest our planet? Sure, I suppose it symbolizes that ET's ship is powered by rainbows, dolphins, the power of love, and all that shit, but maybe step one in not being noticed by the locals might be to turn all your lights OFF while skulking around in the boondocks, you space wankers!
Of course, they might have thought to land a bit farther from town too, considering they could touch down anywhere on the damn planet. Here's a hint; avoid the bright lights when looking for trees; here on earth, they don't spark up like lightbulbs.
Little ET seems to be quite surprised by the glow of the city lights, which is interesting, since he just flew over it 5 minutes ago in his super advanced spaceship. Spielberg's influence - the audience can't think while watching a movie; they can't even remember what happened a few scenes ago, and the characters in the movie can only see what the audience sees, even if they are looking at something off camera.
Ah, yes, the Spielberg influence. Like, when the scary men show up and chase the ETs, they all, each and every one of them, step in a big puddle of water while running through the forest. Now maybe the first guy might accidently step in a puddle, but any sensible person following would simply step over the damn puddle rather than in it. But for Spielberg, nothing matters except that he thinks the big splashes look really cool.
ET hides out in a shed in Elliot's back garden, trying to hide from the scary men. Yes, he is hiding out, because he is scared and hiding out on a hostile planet. Yet when Ellitot flings the ball into the shed to see if anything is there, ET decides to toss the ball back out. Oh, so suddenly ET isn't scared anymore? Why would ET throw the ball back out of the shed? I know, I know, he just wants to play, cause he's a friendly alien from the planet of love. Does he not realize the position he is in? He is surrounded by enemies, and he can't even rely on his so-called buddies, who all just ratted hs sorry ass out for basically no reason that I can discern. Is their planet motto "Leave no ET behind?" Nope, it's more likely to be "It's always bowb your buddy week". 2 points for knowing where that quote comes from. Naw, make it 1000 points, cause you won't get them anyway.
(A nicely plausible reason for the ball throwing is that ET obviously thought it was some kind of a hand grenade, and was trying to blow up his pursuers with their own instrument of death.)
Later, Elliot and the family search the shed. After the boys finish their examination, and turn up nothing, it turns out that ET was hiding in there the whole damn time. Impossible! Then Elliot and the family, (even after assuming that the "Coyote has come back"), leave a box of un-eaten pizza just lying on the grass. Even if they aren't worried about ravenous coyotes, what about picking up your rubbish, you filthy bastards?
Elliot next hunts for ET while flashing a torch around which should be visible from at least a mile away. He comes across ET hiding ineffectually in the bushes, and ET screams as if he has just been surprised by some kind of a stealth ninja - like he couldn't see the spotlight coming closer and closer? Then he runs off, and manages to push Elliot's swings as he disappears. (I thought he just wanted to play?) And he doesn't push just one swing but both swings, a pull up bar (that he is far too short to reach), and the see saw too. All that stuff moving improbably around - it just looks really cool says Spielberg, who the fuck cartes if it's plausible? I'm making this movie for middle America!
So is ET supposed to be smart or stupid? He makes no effort to follow the conversation with the globe and the maps. No sense of tidiness (he just throws the potato slalad on the kitchen floor, no doubt his cabin on the old ET space bus is quite a shocker, eh?). You might think he was a retarded 4 year old. But on the other hand he works out the tv remote, grasps the idea of sending a help message which he gleans from the comics, and dismantles a speak n spell.
I could continue, scene by scene ripping the hell out of this pointless muck, and maybe one day I will, but I am occupied at the moment.
Suffice it to say that besides Raiders and the last 1/2 of Jaws, Spielberg is unwatchable. Only Andrew Adamson is worse.
If you wish to argue, I'll be free next week, but you'll end up crying in the corner. I've read all your other posts you see.