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Zero Punctuation: Mass Erect

#1 User is offline   Sniffles Icon

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Posted 19 December 2007 - 03:17 PM

Did any of you dirty Goyem watch this? I enjoyed it, but it was not his best. He seemed like he was forcing it, since all these jerks were bugging him about reviewing such a big game. But what do I know? I forgot the link, someone post it.
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#2 User is offline   joshofalltrades Icon

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Posted 19 December 2007 - 03:22 PM

It was all worth it for the BC mention at the end.
My Let's Play of I Wanna Be The Guy! Do you have the balls?

--------------------------------------------
The Queen's own English, base knave, dost thou speak it?
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#3 User is offline   bertfallen Icon

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Posted 19 December 2007 - 07:15 PM

http://www.escapistm...ion-Mass-Effect

Link^

He missed two flaws I feel. Aside from that was rather spot on. Still the game can be enjoyable.
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#4 User is offline   cernex Icon

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Posted 19 December 2007 - 07:40 PM

It's in times like this I wish the PC in my job had sound... oh well...

El Cernex
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#5 User is offline   CJ Marren Icon

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Posted 19 December 2007 - 08:43 PM

Alright... but not as good as usual.

Good penis euphenisms though!!
<!--quoteo(post=174818:date=Oct 14 2007, 09:43 AM:name=Cobnat)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Cobnat @ Oct 14 2007, 09:43 AM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=174818"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec--><!--fonto:Microsoft Sans Serif--><span style="font-family:Microsoft Sans Serif"><!--/fonto--><!--sizeo:2--><span style="font-size:10pt;line-height:100%"><!--/sizeo--><!--coloro:#FF0000--><span style="color:#FF0000"><!--/coloro-->Lets all have sex with robots until our groins are sore and bloody!<!--colorc--></span><!--/colorc--><!--sizec--></span><!--/sizec--><!--fontc--></span><!--/fontc--><!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->

<!--quoteo(post=169306:date=Aug 10 2007, 11:03 AM:name=Legion)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Legion @ Aug 10 2007, 11:03 AM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=169306"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec--><!--fonto:Arial--><span style="font-family:Arial"><!--/fonto--><!--coloro:#483D8B--><span style="color:#483D8B"><!--/coloro--><!--sizeo:3--><span style="font-size:12pt;line-height:100%"><!--/sizeo-->So why the unholy flying purple donkeypunching fuck will it not work on yours? Just what kind of machine are you running there? Your toaster?<!--sizec--></span><!--/sizec--><!--colorc--></span><!--/colorc--><!--fontc--></span><!--/fontc--><!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->

And the man again!
<!--quoteo(post=180859:date=Jan 16 2008, 02:29 PM:name=Legion)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Legion @ Jan 16 2008, 02:29 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=180859"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->In my opinion it's saying, fuck the lightsabers and special effects and fuck your voiceovers and fuck your stupid multimilliondollar game studios; you don't need any of those to make brilliant and scary games that will fuck with your head.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->

<u><!--sizeo:3--><span style="font-size:12pt;line-height:100%"><!--/sizeo--><!--coloro:#FF8C00--><span style="color:#FF8C00"><!--/coloro-->My Getting Huge Progress (Gym and weight gain diet)<!--colorc--></span><!--/colorc--><!--sizec--></span><!--/sizec--></u>
<b>May '07:</b> 11st (154lbs)
<b>August '07:</b> 12st 7lbs (175lbs)
<b>November '07:</b> 12st 9lbs (177lbs)
<b>December '07:</b> 12st 11lbs (179lbs)
<b>January '08:</b> 12st 12lbs (180lbs)
<b>Febuary '08:</b> 13st 2lbs (184lbs)
<b>March '08:</b> 13st 7lbs (189lbs)
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#6 User is offline   Sniffles Icon

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Posted 19 December 2007 - 09:29 PM

QUOTE (CJ Marren @ Dec 19 2007, 08:43 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Alright... but not as good as usual.

Good penis euphenisms though!!


When are penis euphemisms not good?
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#7 User is offline   Sylv Icon

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Posted 19 December 2007 - 10:04 PM

Hey, I forgot it was Update Wednesday. Awesome.

Even though I admire short and sweet dialogue in games I'm stupidly willing to wade through giant walls of text* if they catch my interest**. I can see where Yahtzee is coming from though. (And this is apparently one of Bioware's shorter games. Not Jade Empire short, but still fairly slim by their previous standards) And hey, that was a mighty fine dick-joke.



*I'm one of those "Planescape is one of my favorite games ever ever ever" people although I contribute some of that to the whimsy and cosmopolitan flavor of the setting itself.

**I'm still bitter about Neverwinter Nights 2 being so disappointing but don't mind me. I'm just a sucker who bought it on release day.

This post has been edited by Sylv: 19 December 2007 - 10:10 PM

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#8 User is offline   Thaluikhain Icon

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Posted 20 December 2007 - 12:11 AM

Not one of his best reviews, I'd say.

He mostly seems to have gotten over his "I'm gay" thing, though...apart from having sex with Bruce Campbell and the "SPUNK IN MY FACE" thing on the fullyramblomatic thing where he gives the link.

Yahtzee we don't care about your sexuality, we won't judge you. You can stop pretending, it's ok if you're not gay.
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#9 User is offline   Sartain Icon

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Posted 20 December 2007 - 02:21 AM

One of the better reviews. It's only a handful of the Zero Punctuation reviews that actually has me laughing out loud, as opposed to suppressed chuckling, and this one made me laugh out loud several times.
Of course, it's not as if I keep a graded list over Yathzee's review performances...
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#10 User is offline   Jenx Icon

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Posted 20 December 2007 - 03:47 AM

I'm afraid to say I got trough most of it with a straight face.

There have definitely been better reviews before. As for the whole topic of wordy games, I do enjoy them, but as long as the huge amounts of text are on the right place at the right time. Being told one's life story when asking the guy where's the bar really would be annoying, so I can sympathize with that.
QUOTE (Ninja Duck @ Jan 15 2008, 05:45 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
And the film should be shot in sepia, because real life was in sepia in the 1990s.
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#11 User is offline   CJ Marren Icon

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Posted 20 December 2007 - 05:05 AM

QUOTE (Thaluikhain @ Dec 20 2007, 05:11 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Yahtzee we don't care about your sexuality, we won't judge you. You can stop pretending, it's ok if you're not gay.

No no no, I'll leave here if Herr Croshaw isn't a poofter.

How can one respect the inane ramblings of someone who is not a poofter?!
<!--quoteo(post=174818:date=Oct 14 2007, 09:43 AM:name=Cobnat)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Cobnat @ Oct 14 2007, 09:43 AM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=174818"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec--><!--fonto:Microsoft Sans Serif--><span style="font-family:Microsoft Sans Serif"><!--/fonto--><!--sizeo:2--><span style="font-size:10pt;line-height:100%"><!--/sizeo--><!--coloro:#FF0000--><span style="color:#FF0000"><!--/coloro-->Lets all have sex with robots until our groins are sore and bloody!<!--colorc--></span><!--/colorc--><!--sizec--></span><!--/sizec--><!--fontc--></span><!--/fontc--><!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->

<!--quoteo(post=169306:date=Aug 10 2007, 11:03 AM:name=Legion)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Legion @ Aug 10 2007, 11:03 AM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=169306"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec--><!--fonto:Arial--><span style="font-family:Arial"><!--/fonto--><!--coloro:#483D8B--><span style="color:#483D8B"><!--/coloro--><!--sizeo:3--><span style="font-size:12pt;line-height:100%"><!--/sizeo-->So why the unholy flying purple donkeypunching fuck will it not work on yours? Just what kind of machine are you running there? Your toaster?<!--sizec--></span><!--/sizec--><!--colorc--></span><!--/colorc--><!--fontc--></span><!--/fontc--><!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->

And the man again!
<!--quoteo(post=180859:date=Jan 16 2008, 02:29 PM:name=Legion)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Legion @ Jan 16 2008, 02:29 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=180859"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->In my opinion it's saying, fuck the lightsabers and special effects and fuck your voiceovers and fuck your stupid multimilliondollar game studios; you don't need any of those to make brilliant and scary games that will fuck with your head.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->

<u><!--sizeo:3--><span style="font-size:12pt;line-height:100%"><!--/sizeo--><!--coloro:#FF8C00--><span style="color:#FF8C00"><!--/coloro-->My Getting Huge Progress (Gym and weight gain diet)<!--colorc--></span><!--/colorc--><!--sizec--></span><!--/sizec--></u>
<b>May '07:</b> 11st (154lbs)
<b>August '07:</b> 12st 7lbs (175lbs)
<b>November '07:</b> 12st 9lbs (177lbs)
<b>December '07:</b> 12st 11lbs (179lbs)
<b>January '08:</b> 12st 12lbs (180lbs)
<b>Febuary '08:</b> 13st 2lbs (184lbs)
<b>March '08:</b> 13st 7lbs (189lbs)
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#12 User is offline   Thaluikhain Icon

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Posted 20 December 2007 - 08:15 AM

QUOTE (CJ Marren @ Dec 20 2007, 09:05 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
No no no, I'll leave here if Herr Croshaw isn't a poofter.

How can one respect the inane ramblings of someone who is not a poofter?!


There's nothing wrong with a person who happens to be not not straight...cease your homophobiaphobia.
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#13 User is offline   CJ Marren Icon

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Posted 20 December 2007 - 08:26 AM

How do I know he's not gay? I'm not going to post on a forum unless the head honcho drowns me in his love tequila after checking out my maraca.

So there.
<!--quoteo(post=174818:date=Oct 14 2007, 09:43 AM:name=Cobnat)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Cobnat @ Oct 14 2007, 09:43 AM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=174818"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec--><!--fonto:Microsoft Sans Serif--><span style="font-family:Microsoft Sans Serif"><!--/fonto--><!--sizeo:2--><span style="font-size:10pt;line-height:100%"><!--/sizeo--><!--coloro:#FF0000--><span style="color:#FF0000"><!--/coloro-->Lets all have sex with robots until our groins are sore and bloody!<!--colorc--></span><!--/colorc--><!--sizec--></span><!--/sizec--><!--fontc--></span><!--/fontc--><!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->

<!--quoteo(post=169306:date=Aug 10 2007, 11:03 AM:name=Legion)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Legion @ Aug 10 2007, 11:03 AM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=169306"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec--><!--fonto:Arial--><span style="font-family:Arial"><!--/fonto--><!--coloro:#483D8B--><span style="color:#483D8B"><!--/coloro--><!--sizeo:3--><span style="font-size:12pt;line-height:100%"><!--/sizeo-->So why the unholy flying purple donkeypunching fuck will it not work on yours? Just what kind of machine are you running there? Your toaster?<!--sizec--></span><!--/sizec--><!--colorc--></span><!--/colorc--><!--fontc--></span><!--/fontc--><!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->

And the man again!
<!--quoteo(post=180859:date=Jan 16 2008, 02:29 PM:name=Legion)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Legion @ Jan 16 2008, 02:29 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=180859"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->In my opinion it's saying, fuck the lightsabers and special effects and fuck your voiceovers and fuck your stupid multimilliondollar game studios; you don't need any of those to make brilliant and scary games that will fuck with your head.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->

<u><!--sizeo:3--><span style="font-size:12pt;line-height:100%"><!--/sizeo--><!--coloro:#FF8C00--><span style="color:#FF8C00"><!--/coloro-->My Getting Huge Progress (Gym and weight gain diet)<!--colorc--></span><!--/colorc--><!--sizec--></span><!--/sizec--></u>
<b>May '07:</b> 11st (154lbs)
<b>August '07:</b> 12st 7lbs (175lbs)
<b>November '07:</b> 12st 9lbs (177lbs)
<b>December '07:</b> 12st 11lbs (179lbs)
<b>January '08:</b> 12st 12lbs (180lbs)
<b>Febuary '08:</b> 13st 2lbs (184lbs)
<b>March '08:</b> 13st 7lbs (189lbs)
0

#14 User is offline   Sniffles Icon

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Posted 20 December 2007 - 03:37 PM

QUOTE (Thaluikhain @ Dec 20 2007, 12:11 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Not one of his best reviews, I'd say.

He mostly seems to have gotten over his "I'm gay" thing, though...apart from having sex with Bruce Campbell and the "SPUNK IN MY FACE" thing on the fullyramblomatic thing where he gives the link.

Yahtzee we don't care about your sexuality, we won't judge you. You can stop pretending, it's ok if you're not gay.



QUOTE (CJ Marren @ Dec 20 2007, 05:05 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
No no no, I'll leave here if Herr Croshaw isn't a poofter.

How can one respect the inane ramblings of someone who is not a poofter?!



QUOTE (Thaluikhain @ Dec 20 2007, 08:15 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
There's nothing wrong with a person who happens to be not not straight...cease your homophobiaphobia.



QUOTE (CJ Marren @ Dec 20 2007, 08:26 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
How do I know he's not gay? I'm not going to post on a forum unless the head honcho drowns me in his love tequila after checking out my maraca.

So there.



Looks to me like we have some translation issues here. Thalklywhatever, I think you were trying to say that it's ok if Yahtzee is gay. And CJ Marren was commenting on that by saying it's not okay if he's not gay. So he's not being homophobic, he's being... heterophobic, but in actuality he's neither because in either case he's kidding, and this is retarded of me to even by clearing up for people because it's nonsense. Fart.
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#15 User is offline   ?!! Icon

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Posted 20 December 2007 - 04:20 PM

How about we just say everyone's gay? Then there will be no more confusion.
We're whalers on the moon
We carry a harpoon
But there ain't no whales so we tell tall tales
And sing a whaling tune

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