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Comic Silliness 100% impractical SW comic stories

#1 User is offline   Sandy Claws Icon

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Posted 26 December 2007 - 04:57 PM

I went to Wikipedia and discovered that Darth Vader fought a resurrected or cloned Darth Maul. while that's crazy, it turns out he won. now can you honestly imagine a rigid cyborg besting the speedy swordfighter we saw in TPM?

I think it would've been best for Lucas to keep the concept of lightsabers being heavy objects, because the inconsistancy of saber weight creates a saga wide inconsistancy which runs into the comics naturally.

can you guys name some more crazy and impractical stories from the SW comics? laugh.gif

This post has been edited by Sandy Claws: 26 December 2007 - 05:03 PM

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#2 User is offline   Toru-chan Icon

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Posted 26 December 2007 - 06:38 PM

QUOTE (Sandy Claws @ Dec 27 2007, 07:57 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
can you guys name some more crazy and impractical stories from the SW comics?


The movies are already full of the crazy and impractical. Boba Fett escaping the giant worm on Tattooine, spurned on by nothing more than the cheering of virile fan boys.

BTW bummed to hear Darth Maul was cloned. I said in the 'Monopoly' thread he wasn't the only character in the Star Wars Universe that didn't come back from the dead.

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#3 User is offline   KurganX Icon

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Posted 19 January 2008 - 03:46 PM

Well, didn't they say that the first 20 issues of Star Wars Tales were non-canon (that includes the tale of Darth Maul's survival/resurrection/fight with Vader)?

Not that it matters, but still. A lot of the non-canon stuff allows them to right the most contrived and ridiculous stories (even by EU standards).
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#4 User is offline   Helena Icon

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Posted 19 January 2008 - 04:41 PM

QUOTE (Sandy Claws @ Dec 26 2007, 09:57 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I went to Wikipedia and discovered that Darth Vader fought a resurrected or cloned Darth Maul. while that's crazy, it turns out he won. now can you honestly imagine a rigid cyborg besting the speedy swordfighter we saw in TPM?

blink.gif Dear God, is there any storyline so stupid or ridiculous that they won't use it for the comics?

QUOTE
The sandpeople had women and children. We know this because Anakin killed them how could he tell? The children might be smaller but I never saw a sandperson with breasts. Did they hike their skirts and show him some leg or something?

QUOTE
Also, I can see the point of wanting to kidnap a human and use her as a slave, but they didn't. They tied her to a flimsy easel for a month. It's assumed they had to feed and give her water. What for? Was she purely ornamental? I can understand them wanting the droids, you can sell those for a lot of money, but a chick who's only skills are finding non-existand mushrooms and getting randomly pregnant, you're not going to get much.

- J m HofMarN on the Sand People
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#5 User is offline   Saberist Icon

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Posted 20 January 2008 - 07:20 PM

QUOTE (Helena @ Jan 19 2008, 02:41 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
blink.gif Dear God, is there any storyline so stupid or ridiculous that they won't use it for the comics?


Well, when you have Lucas as an iconic example of how much a correspondence course degree in script writing is worth...:``)

That said, I don't knock the fanfic for two reasons:

1. Story _telling_ is a dynamic art.
At least it used to be, as an oral tradition. Which is not to say that summating and finalizing a story as an editorially revamped work is not a good way to clean up 'the tradition' as a function of legitimated retcon (religions do this all the time, why can't we?). But rather that, so long as there is an experimentalist phase, those who write with big visions of small stories have a chance to add very special 'dynamic scenes' that might otherwise never -find- continuity in a larger story.

2. The Storyline _Is Awful_.
As it now stands, we have lost any and all affinity with The Jedi and The Force as a driving element of a grander theme. Something I hope to fix. And that can only happen if we acknowledge that, while certain themes will always be cool (Lightsabers, The Force, Interstellar War). The execution needs to be almost completely revamped for these to be integrated successfully into a larger universal dynamic.

As you yourself mentioned in another thread: What is it about The Force that makes it a religion or not? Is it a fear of proselytizing in a 'must meet all demographic wishes' sense of acceptable pablum?

IMO, that is cowardly. Becaues religion is about morality (or tries to be) and morality is not a fixed set of laws but a situational ethics driven sense of efficiencies. Efficiencies in turn are the stuff of evolutionary change. Both social and personal. And THAT is where Star Wars could speak. Not in an elitist fashion but still in a new edition one.

The EU provides, if not exactly a template for a brave new world of Star Wars to work from, then at least the backing proof that 'nothing is impossible if you accept this other...'stuff'' correlate.

Someday, the story will change. As people will realize that it no longer is cohesive with their own or any motive or morality. And then the EU will be the place to both harvest the best writers. And create an architecture for 'what doesn't work or doesn't need to be repeated' in the next edition.

That is, ironically, also why I applaud the other side of the street: For if you don't like what is done in the EU, then HUGE blocks of this 20,000 year old society open up to revisitation. And the farther away from BBY/ABY you get, the more the nature of the presented (cough, Lucas being Lucas, AGAIN) characterizations and environmentalism can be altered. Or even restated.

Is 20,000 years too long for a society to persist as only 'partly divine'? How about 5,000? 20,000 years ago on Earth, we hadn't made metal tools. 5,000 years ago we now know that simple bronze axeheads did exist (Otzi, the glacier guy). Along with various working levels of society (Egypt had tax labels on jars of goods) to differentiate the functionally primitive from the primitively advanced.


KPl.
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#6 User is offline   TruJade Icon

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Posted 20 January 2008 - 11:31 PM

I have read a comic that places Darth Maul
with a mechanical four-pronged spider lower half
at Tatooine. Maul is going to exact his revenge

on the four year old Luke, when Obi-wan confronts him
the end result is a dead dead Darth Maul
but the drawings were cool

and hey it could have happened :rollseyes:

Of course theres that one comic where Luke actually
dies in the tauntaun after being rescued and its all up to
Han and Leia to bringdown the Emipre

thats were i stopped reading
but i might give it another try to
regale you all with other tales of silliness

This post has been edited by TruJade: 20 January 2008 - 11:34 PM


Duct tape is like the force....

There's a lightside, a darkside

and it holds everything together


There are too many people in the world...We need another plague -Dwight K. Shrute [The Office]
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