[Frank the Rabbit]

I was in walmart the other day, and began thinking about what each star wars movie would be if it was a type of food, here's what i concluded.


Episode 1, The Shrimp Salad: It's mostly lettuce, a nice long bland bowl of food but every once in a while you'll find a good piece of shrimp, some meat that makes it worth eating.

Episode 2, The Bowl of Soup: Much like the shrimp salad, there's not much too it but broth, but still, broth tastes much better than lettuce, and you'll find some tasty vegetables in it if you try.

Episode 3, The Appetizer: This finally gets you pumped for dinner. After dishes that leave you very hungry for more, this gets you excited. after you're done, you're still hungry, but now you know whats in store.

Episode 4, The Glass of Wine: Ahh, the good old days right?? Its always good just to sit back and enjoy something with class, something you can respect.

Episode 5, The Steak: The highlight of the meal. It is the thickest and juiciest part of the meal and it leaves you full, content, and happy. It takes the longest to prepare, because it pays off most in the end.

Episode 6, The Dessert: The last little bit of meal tagged onto the end. It tastes good, probably better than anything yet, but its not exactly good for you and you feel the slightest bit of regret for having indulged yourself.

[Bond]

Wow, that was terrific! I never thought of Jedi as a yummy pudding before, but now... well, serve me up!

EDIT: Do you think you could make a dinner comparison to some other film series? Harry Potter or James Bond, for example?

This post has been edited by Bond: 23 July 2007 - 09:31 PM

[TheOrator]

No, I think it'd go more like...

Episode 1: Undercooked mozzarella sticks. It's really thick and gooey, and the breading is tasteless, and you suspect it isn't actually mozzarella...but it gets points for trying.

Episode 2: Salad. It hasn't really got anything of substance, but tries to make up for it by putting a lot of dressing on it. It isn't filling at all.

Episode 3: Soup. It's too salty, mostly water, and has noodles shaped like letters of the alphabet, like it was made for kids.

Episode 4: Wine. Finally, something worth while, because 1977 was a very good year.

Episode 5: Lasagna. You are now certain it has real mozzarella, the noodles look nothing like any letters, and the meat is very filling.

Episode 6: Dessert. The ice cream would have been better if you hadn't found that big hair in it.


As you pay the bill, you realize that you paid far too much for the appetizers.

You don't think you'll be coming to Chez George again.

---------

And Bond, I don't think there are meals long enough for a comparison to the Bond films.

Except for an All-You-Can-Eat buffet.

[Bond]

The Harry Potter films, then?

And here's my comparison:


Episode 1: Oh, come on, who got you the kiddie meal? Sure, it's got genuine flavour, and it's nice and compact, but, overall, you were expecting something a bit more filling.

Episode 2: After sending the kiddie meal back and requesting a chicken salad, the hostess comes back and gives you this thing. Apparently, it's punishment for not liking the first thing: it's gooey, gloppy, the leaves are cut too sharply, and the chicken has a distinct flavour of bananas. Overall, it's a bit of an improvement over the first course, but not by much.

Episode 3: With this meal, it seems the cook has forgiven you for the earlier faux pas, for the waitress has returned with the most delicious bread you've ever tasted. The buttery sweetness, the rich texture, and the delightful crispness make it a delectable sampler. It might be too crusty for your palate, and the bread might not be the kind you prefer, but it sure as heck gets you excited for the next course.

Episode 4: Your lips are smacking as the hostess brings out the wine, and what a wine it is! Chardonnay, 1977 vintage, the drink is soon flowing over your tongue, and you feel a thought pop into your satisfied head -- this is quality.

Episode 5: But, no, the cook decides to top himself, and the waitress brings back the real meal -- delicious roasted meat, with a side of mashed potatoes and gravy, all brought together by the reassuring presence of assorted vegetables. There is no way, you now think, this meal can ever be satisfactorily completed.

Episode 6: Alas, you are correct; the hostess next brings out a knickerbocker glory, but it seems prefabricated. The cloying sweetness gets to you, and, while the jelly does bring a satisfyingly dark richness to the dessert, on the whole, your meal ends off on a manufactured note.

[princesskadee]

No, I think it'd go more like...

Episode 1: Undercooked mozzarella sticks. It's really thick and gooey, and the breading is tasteless, and you suspect it isn't actually mozzarella...but it gets points for trying.

if the mozzarella sticks are undercooked,..how are they gooey?

[Bond]

No idea...

Perhaps... it's just a metaphor?

[TheOrator]

if the mozzarella sticks are undercooked,..how are they gooey?

Um...They're really cold, I mean. Or something.

[Bond]

What did you think of my comparison? Too easy on the PT?

[TheOrator]

Even mine is too easy on the PT.

I compared it to something edible.

[Bond]

Ah. All right, then...

[Despondent]

I'll bite.


Episode 1:
Waiting for your table, you go to the bar. If there's no bar, you wait outside for an hour, bored stiff. (You're not having much fun, but it's a night out, right?)

Episode 2:
You look over the menu and don't see anything you like.

Episode 3:
First the Appetizer sampler, brought to your table quick and hot. But before it has a chance to cool, your salad arrives. Halfway into your salad, the entree appears. Nothing really stands out as memorable.

Episode IV:
You leave the restaurant for a breath of fresh air.

Episode V:
You go to the ice cream parlor. It's a Ben and Jerry's, and everything's free.

Episode VI:
They force-feed you ice cream until you feel sick. But you'd probably do it again.

This post has been edited by Despondent: 24 July 2007 - 10:28 PM