Chefelf.com Night Life: Born From Jets: An Open Letter to Saab - Chefelf.com Night Life

Jump to content

  • (2 Pages)
  • +
  • 1
  • 2

Born From Jets: An Open Letter to Saab Wednesday, July 11, 2007

#1 User is offline   Chefelf Icon

  • LittleHorse Fan
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • Group: Admin
  • Posts: 4,522
  • Joined: 30-October 03
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:New York, NY
  • Country:United States

Posted 11 July 2007 - 12:04 PM

Born From Jets: An Open Letter to Saab

Dear Saab,

This July, as I begin my annual viewing of the Tour de France, I am yet again assaulted by your "Born From Jets" ad campaign. This is a campaign which I became intimately familiar with during last year's tour and I'm disappointed to see that the campaign returns, unchanged, this year. It's the same exact ad during every single commercial break. Perhaps the Versus channel, formerly OLN, has been running the ad since last year but since I do not watch shows about bass fishing I have been blissfully unaware of its airing since last July.

In this ad you show a car racing through the desert (pretty standard) and above it is a perfect V-formation of jets flying about 60 feet off the ground (that's normal, right?) just above the car. I don't know much about jets but I'd have to guess that the car and the jets are all traveling just around 600 miles per hour. The announcer then comes on and starts bragging about how Saab was founded by aircraft engineers. The announcer rambles on a bit about how great Saab is and then hits us again with another cockily voiced, "Saab. Born from JETS!" Then they display their ridiculous rampant griffin logo and the commercial ends.

Here are a few questions:

Are you trying to impress us that Saab was founded by people who used to make jets? Were they good at making jets? If so, why did they stop? Why make cars? Isn't it kind of like advertising a made for TV movie on Lifetime starring Harisson Ford and bragging about how he used to be in real movies?

If you could make jets so well, why did you stop? Were you just really bad at it? Were these 16 aeronautical engineers kicked out of jet making school for having failing grades? Maybe they just weren't very good with numbers and the imprecision of their calculations would cause jets to explode but may be tolerable in a less volatile mechanism such as a car engine.

So why are we supposed to trust these jet flunkies with our automobiles? Are these D students somehow supposed to be respected because they try really hard? Why is it that we should give our money to a bunch of remedial jet designers?

Help me to understand, Saab, why it is that being born from jets is as badass as you and your silly griffin make it out to be.
See Chefelf in a Movie! -> The People vs. George Lucas

Buy the New LittleHorse CD, Strangers in the Valley!
CD Baby | iTunes | LittleHorse - Flight of the Bumblebee Video

Chefelf on: Twitter | friendfeed | Jaiku | Bitstrips | Muxtape | Mento | MySpace | Flickr | YouTube | LibraryThing
0

#2 User is offline   Deepsycher Icon

  • Giantness of Heart
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • Group: Former Members
  • Posts: 6,220
  • Joined: 22-December 05
  • Country:Nothing Selected

Posted 11 July 2007 - 01:13 PM

Hehe as simply put as I can think of "Their cars fell out of an ugly tree."

This post has been edited by Deepsycher: 11 July 2007 - 01:14 PM

0

#3 User is offline   Slade Icon

  • Full of Bombs and/or Keys
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • Group: Head Moderator
  • Posts: 8,626
  • Joined: 30-November 03
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:Columbia, SC
  • Interests:I like stuff.
  • Country:United States

Posted 11 July 2007 - 04:24 PM

They could be worse, Dee. They could be Scions. tongue.gif
This space for rent. Inquire within.
0

#4 User is offline   Deepsycher Icon

  • Giantness of Heart
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • Group: Former Members
  • Posts: 6,220
  • Joined: 22-December 05
  • Country:Nothing Selected

Posted 11 July 2007 - 04:31 PM

You mean this ugly apple or peary sort of look?



Above: And that ugly tree was a plane.
After another read I thought of this:

Saab

Seeking academic attention boastfully
0

#5 User is offline   Slade Icon

  • Full of Bombs and/or Keys
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • Group: Head Moderator
  • Posts: 8,626
  • Joined: 30-November 03
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:Columbia, SC
  • Interests:I like stuff.
  • Country:United States

Posted 11 July 2007 - 07:09 PM

Yes, that is precisely the horrendous body design and paint job I was referencing with those awful Scions.
This space for rent. Inquire within.
0

#6 User is offline   Deepsycher Icon

  • Giantness of Heart
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • Group: Former Members
  • Posts: 6,220
  • Joined: 22-December 05
  • Country:Nothing Selected

Posted 11 July 2007 - 07:15 PM

If the metal is designed to bend in an accident I can see the bonnet folding round the victim(s) then scizzoring them to bits.

This post has been edited by Deepsycher: 11 July 2007 - 07:16 PM

0

#7 User is offline   mickey Icon

  • New Cop
  • Group: Junior Members
  • Posts: 3
  • Joined: 11-July 07
  • Country:United States

Posted 11 July 2007 - 11:11 PM

I agree with you guys...

I have had a few problems with the saab parts, but I have had another 2000 9-5, so I am aware of the common problems.

I sent the SID to Guy at www.macassemble.com, and they repaired it for 85.00 with a warranty on it too.

I did pull the oil pan and saab valve cover; saab valve cover gasket too, and had them all cleaned at a machine shop.

Honestly, every car I have had, came with their own issues at one time or another.

You can't beat the comfort and styling of this car.

Great ride but a headache for me...
0

#8 User is offline   mireaux7 Icon

  • Level Boss
  • PipPipPip
  • Group: Members
  • Posts: 475
  • Joined: 24-September 06
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:dallas, texas
  • Interests:art, tennis, films...esp foreign films-those are some of the best ones ive seen, video games, reading, travel.
  • Country:United States

Posted 13 July 2007 - 08:48 PM

they used to make jets, and now they only make cars?

geez,.sounds like a really sad saab story.
QUOTE (njamilla @ Feb 23 2008, 08:16 AM)
Shit, Fuck, Piss: I had to say that because I can on this website. (Thanks Chef!)

QUOTE (chefelf @ Feb 23 2008, 10:30 AM)
That's what I'm here for.
0

#9 User is offline   J m HofMarN Icon

  • Knows All The Girls Named Lola
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • Group: Members
  • Posts: 7,232
  • Joined: 24-May 04
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:Rural Pahrump Nevada
  • Interests:Tyranny
  • Country:United States

Posted 14 July 2007 - 04:22 AM

That sounds like an awesome plot for a thriller.

"Banned from making jets, the saab scientists prepare an army of transforming cars to take their revenge. Also, some of the cars are evil."

But yeah, now that I think of it there are implied questions there, just like the ones I'd face if I went into pet food.

"I used to be a professional chef, now I make meow mix."

Quote

I don't know about you but I have never advocated that homosexuals, for any reason, be cut out of their mother's womb and thrown into a bin.
- Deucaon toes a hard line on gay fetus rights.
0

#10 User is offline   Emu Icon

  • the internets
  • PipPipPipPipPip
  • Group: Members
  • Posts: 1,544
  • Joined: 15-November 03
  • Location:Massachusetts Tool & Die
  • Interests:fire, typing random things; getting guys drunk and getting them to do my Spanish homework for me; time travel; exploding things.
  • Country:United States

Posted 14 July 2007 - 09:31 AM

QUOTE ("mireaux7")
geez,.sounds like a really sad saab story.

laugh.gif

(badum-tssh!)
Head Gunner for the Royal Sloop Crimson Steel, Queen of the Dead, Instigator of Chaos and Confusion, Knight of the Grand Recursive Order of the Lambda Calculus, and also The Non.

Remember Emu's face, people; one day it's going to be on the news alongside a headline about blowing some landmark to smithereens, and then we can all sigh and say, "She was such a normal person".....
....We'd be lying though.
-Laughlyn

If my doctor tells me to exercise, I am going to force him to do my homework.
-Mirithorn

- Do Not Use the Elevators - deviantART - Infinite Monkeys -
0

#11 User is offline   srmoore Icon

  • Level Boss
  • PipPipPip
  • Group: Redcloud Collective
  • Posts: 352
  • Joined: 02-November 03
  • Location:Boston.. sortof
  • Country:Nothing Selected

Posted 14 July 2007 - 11:04 AM

In actuality Saab still makes Jets.
But they sold off the car company years ago and GM bought them (the car company not the jet company).

So... really their ad should be "Saab. Bought from some guys who make jets."
0

#12 User is offline   Chefelf Icon

  • LittleHorse Fan
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • Group: Admin
  • Posts: 4,522
  • Joined: 30-October 03
  • Gender:Male
  • Location:New York, NY
  • Country:United States

Posted 16 July 2007 - 01:42 PM

QUOTE (srmoore @ Jul 14 2007, 12:04 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
In actuality Saab still makes Jets.
But they sold off the car company years ago and GM bought them (the car company not the jet company).

So... really their ad should be "Saab. Bought from some guys who make jets."


Yeah, they scroll something at the bottom of the screen that quickly says the two companies are no longer affiliated. It makes the claim even less impressive!
See Chefelf in a Movie! -> The People vs. George Lucas

Buy the New LittleHorse CD, Strangers in the Valley!
CD Baby | iTunes | LittleHorse - Flight of the Bumblebee Video

Chefelf on: Twitter | friendfeed | Jaiku | Bitstrips | Muxtape | Mento | MySpace | Flickr | YouTube | LibraryThing
0

#13 User is offline   Bond Icon

  • Agent 007
  • PipPipPip
  • Group: Limited Members
  • Posts: 295
  • Joined: 13-July 07
  • Location:Her Majesty's Secret Service
  • Interests:James Bond, Star Wars, Harry Potter
  • Country:United States

Posted 16 July 2007 - 04:35 PM

Saying they're "born from jets" is like saying "Bond: Born from books!" It makes no fuckin' sense. wacko.gif
IPB Image

You only live twice:
Once when you're born
And once when you look death in the face.

--Ian Fleming
0

#14 User is offline   Trumble Trickly Icon

  • New Cop
  • Group: Members
  • Posts: 19
  • Joined: 07-December 04
  • Country:Nothing Selected

Posted 21 July 2007 - 01:24 PM

Hey check it out. Someone has taken major offense to chefelf's rant of the saab ads: http://www.trollhatt...m-jets-ads.html

Funny 'born from jets' search in google brings up chef's article on the first page along with the response.
0

#15 User is offline   Bond Icon

  • Agent 007
  • PipPipPip
  • Group: Limited Members
  • Posts: 295
  • Joined: 13-July 07
  • Location:Her Majesty's Secret Service
  • Interests:James Bond, Star Wars, Harry Potter
  • Country:United States

Posted 21 July 2007 - 01:31 PM

Seems like all those morons over there are stereotyping our Chefelf as a "dumb American". Boy, if I ever get my hands on them... angry.gif
IPB Image

You only live twice:
Once when you're born
And once when you look death in the face.

--Ian Fleming
0

  • (2 Pages)
  • +
  • 1
  • 2


Fast Reply

  • Decrease editor size
  • Increase editor size