[parcelbombsmurf]

Who loves the 7-Layer Burrito from Taco Bell? If you're a Taco Bell fan in general, you probably like this item. It has continued to be a staple for several years after its introduction to the Taco Bell menu several years ago.

Some time after the introduction of the 7-Layer Burrito, Del Taco attempted to shatter Taco Bell's hold on the Mexican-style fast food market with the unprecedented 8-LAYER BURRITO. Consumers had to be thinking: "why the hell would I go to Taco Bell and get a 7-Layer Burrito, when I can go to Dell Taco and get an 8-Layer Burrito." My answer: "the eighth layer could be fecal matter," in which case, more would not necessarily be better. In fact, I thought Del Taco's 8-Layer Burrito was a shameless advertising ploy. Sadly, it probably worked on some of America's consumers. I know it worked on Lucas because he is all about MORE IS ALWAYS BETTER. I'm sure you can come up with examples, but my favorite: lightsabers.

In Episodes IV-VI, 1 lightsaber, at best, to a Jedi, Luke had 1, Obi-Wan had 1, and Darth Vader had 1. In fact, Yoda had 0 (or he was hiding his 1 little lightsaber on Dagobah).

So how do we make Episode I better? We'll give the villain a double-lightsaber. It's not 1 lightsaber. It's not 2 lightsabers. We'll say it's 1 1/2 lightsabers. Darth Maul is cooler because he has more lightsabers.

Well, now what the hell are we gonna do to top Darth Maul's 1 1/2 lightsabers? That's easy. We'll have Anakin dual-wield 2 lightsabers. That is much cooler than Darth Maul. Fans will like it because more is better.

You can't top 2 lightsabers, can you? But we have to do something for Episode III to top Episode II. How can that possibly be done? How about a ridiculous 4-armed cyborg who wields in each hand, a lightsaber? You are amazing Lucas!

I wish there was an Episode VII so we could see an octupus jedi with 8 lightsabers. And then in Episode VIII, a vehicle that has a cannon that shoots lightsabers out of a minigun. And finally in Episode IX, a porcupine Death Star where each of its billion spines is its own gigantic lightsaber, and the thing just goes crashing into planets. I am drunk with ideas!

Anyway, thanks to my favorite filmmaker for his subtle amelioration of each subsequent movie!

[civilian_number_two]

Strong post. To go from the 8-layer burrito to a lightsaber-spraying minigun shows a talent for metaphor. You have my respect.

[TruJade]

I had never thought of
the lightsaber issue in such a way

Amazing!!!
My respect you have as well

[parcelbombsmurf]

Who loves the 7-Layer Burrito from Taco Bell? If you're a Taco Bell fan in general, you probably like this item. It has continued to be a staple for several years after its introduction to the Taco Bell menu several years ago.

Some time after the introduction of the 7-Layer Burrito, Del Taco attempted to shatter Taco Bell's hold on the Mexican-style fast food market with the unprecedented 8-LAYER BURRITO. Consumers had to be thinking: "why the hell would I go to Taco Bell and get a 7-Layer Burrito, when I can go to Dell Taco and get an 8-Layer Burrito." My answer: "the eighth layer could be fecal matter," in which case, more would not necessarily be better. In fact, I thought Del Taco's 8-Layer Burrito was a shameless advertising ploy. Sadly, it probably worked on some of America's consumers. I know it worked on Lucas because he is all about MORE IS ALWAYS BETTER. I'm sure you can come up with examples, but my favorite: lightsabers.

In Episodes IV-VI, 1 lightsaber, at best, to a Jedi, Luke had 1, Obi-Wan had 1, and Darth Vader had 1. In fact, Yoda had 0 (or he was hiding his 1 little lightsaber on Dagobah).

So how do we make Episode I better? We'll give the villain a double-lightsaber. It's not 1 lightsaber. It's not 2 lightsabers. We'll say it's 1 1/2 lightsabers. Darth Maul is cooler because he has more lightsabers.

Well, now what the hell are we gonna do to top Darth Maul's 1 1/2 lightsabers? That's easy. We'll have Anakin dual-wield 2 lightsabers. That is much cooler than Darth Maul. Fans will like it because more is better.

You can't top 2 lightsabers, can you? But we have to do something for Episode III to top Episode II. How can that possibly be done? How about a ridiculous 4-armed cyborg who wields in each hand, a lightsaber? You are amazing Lucas!

I wish there was an Episode VII so we could see an octupus jedi with 8 lightsabers. And then in Episode VIII, a vehicle that has a cannon that shoots lightsabers out of a minigun. And finally in Episode IX, a porcupine Death Star where each of its billion spines is its own gigantic lightsaber, and the thing just goes crashing into planets. I am drunk with ideas!

Anyway, thanks to my favorite filmmaker for his subtle amelioration of each subsequent movie!

I know replying to yourself is kind of like masturbating so I apologize in advance. But I was just taking a look at Chefelf's complaints about ROTS and found this to support Lucas's MORE IS BETTER mentality:

Reason #3 (lifted from Chefelf)
X-Wing Precursors (Two Wings Are Better Than Three)
Like so many ships in the prequel trilogy, the tri-wings make you wonder why they decided to downgrade these ships to the X-wing form we see in the original trilogy. Perhaps this was some sort of money-saving move. Perhaps they found four wings to be more efficient than six. At any rate, it seems to be that Lucas's vision of the prequels and his vision of the original trilogy are like two southern magnet ends that, no matter how hard you try, you can't get to touch. Here is another perfectly good opportunity to introduce something that we'd recognize and connect with the original movies, and it is completely thrown away. Why even have anything be the same? Why not just cast a green Danny Devito as Yoda?

[Storm]

I don't know if I would agree with the assessment that "more is better". In fact, the person with more lightsabers loses every duel.

Darth Maul has a double bladed light saber and ends up getting cut in half. Anakin wields two light sabers at once and gets his arm cut off. General Grievous holds four lightsabers and has both those hands cut off in less than 30 seconds. If anything, it showed that having the tradional one lightsaber was the way to go.

[TruJade]

Hmmm you see i think it
went a little something like this

Darth Maul only had his ass handed to him
because he under-estimated Obi

Anakin Lost his arm b/c he's a cocky bastard
and believed he could beat some old washed up jedi

and once again Grievous believed himself
the better in his entaglement with Kenobi

simply due to the fact he was programed to
be better and had killed a few others

so if anything it has to do with arrogance,
bad guestimates and knowledge in the force

[Sailor Abbey]

Darth Maul only had his ass handed to him because he under-estimated Obi

Darth Maul only got his 'ass handed to him' because GL is a moron who killed off what could have been one of the coolest SW villains ever. If you watch that death scene its really pathetic - there’s just no way Obi-wan would have one that fight.

[barend]

the *wings bothered me, but by ep3 i didn't care enough to get upset.

i wanna see this octopus jedi now.

[Chefelf]

parcelbombsmurf is exactly right. It's the problem we see in the latest SW movies and we've been discussing it in the Spider-Man 3 thread. This constant need to one up the previous movie (add an extra villain, an extra arm, 2 extra lightsabers, etc.) makes movies reach the point of absurdity very quickly.

Action movies have ALWAYS been over the top but as someone pointed out the action in the latest movies (Spider-Man 3) is so fast you can't even really follow it.

[parcelbombsmurf]

Darth Maul only got his 'ass handed to him' because GL is a moron who killed off what could have been one of the coolest SW villains ever. If you watch that death scene its really pathetic - there’s just no way Obi-wan would have one that fight.

I think they should make Darth Abbey, hidden apprentice of Darth Maul, who has millions of lightsabers. How does she do it? Well, right before combat begins, Darth Abbey wills the millions of midi-chlorians to jump from her body. At that moment, each of the millions of midi-chlorians whips out a microscopic lightsaber and attacks the enemy. The enemy instantly combusts from a millions of simultaneous microscopic lightsaber wounds. Some of the midi-chlorians may even have double-lightsabers or be dual-wielding lightsabers! Once the enemy is defeated, the midi-chlorians shut off their lightsabers and jump back into Darth Abbey's body. If you're reading this Lucas, I want my cut!

[Just your average movie goer]

Great posts, Parcelbombsmurf. I also love your username and avatar by the way... they're so wickedly evil.

You're all absolutely right about the one-upmanship deal in movies. It's a very common problem. Also, it does more than just make the movie seem ridiculous. It can overwhelm the audience.

For instance, did anybody else think that some of the big scenes in these films had enough flashing lights and sound effects to cause a seizure? I personally think that each of the prequels should come with a label warning that they are unsuitable for people with epilepsy...

... although on second thoughts, they're really unsuitable for most people. The damage that they can do to our molar caps through making us grind our teeth...

Also, I just have to clear the air on something. It's about a comment Sailor Abbey made. She's not the first. Many people have made the same comment. However, I really think it's time to sort this out.

Darth Maul was not an underused villain who would have been the coolest villain ever had he got the chance. How is this, you may ask? It is the simple fact that we can only judge him by what we saw. And what we saw was a guy who, while he seemed to have been able to hold his own, got killed after his second lightsabre duel.

Let's not waste time imagining what he could have been like if things were different. It's like Mace. Many people say "I know Mace fought like a pansy in the movie but in the books, he kicks ass." I'm sorry. I've only got those crappy movies to go on and in those movies, he didn't add up to much.

Anyway, I'm surprised that people have taken any interest at all in any of these dull cardboard characters from what turned out to be three of the most worthless films ever made. That R5 unit with the bad motivator in 'Star Wars' is more interesting than anybody in the prequels.

Okay, I hope that helps to clear everybody's heads.

Getting back on topic, I just wanted to say that Parcelbombsmurf, what's really amazing about this thread is that you've come to a forum where we've been retreading the same old ground till it's hard enough to drive a truck on... and you've posted something NEW.

I take my hat off to you. A very good point very well illustrated.

This post has been edited by Just your average movie goer: 15 May 2007 - 06:16 AM

[princesskadee]

I think they should make Darth Abbey, hidden apprentice of Darth Maul, who has millions of lightsabers. How does she do it? Well, right before combat begins, Darth Abbey wills the millions of midi-chlorians to jump from her body. At that moment, each of the millions of midi-chlorians whips out a microscopic lightsaber and attacks the enemy. The enemy instantly combusts from a millions of simultaneous microscopic lightsaber wounds. Some of the midi-chlorians may even have double-lightsabers or be dual-wielding lightsabers! Once the enemy is defeated, the midi-chlorians shut off their lightsabers and jump back into Darth Abbey's body. If you're reading this Lucas, I want my cut!

wow, that many midi-chlorians flying around with that many lighsabers??...its sounds like a summertime firefly orgy.

[civilian_number_two]

Hear hear, moviegoer.

While Ray Park is good at the flippin and the flyin, Darth Maul was just a guy with face paint. I think he has one line, something non-specific about revenge. So no, he wasn't and should never be considered a "character." Some of the special effects had more character than he had.

At least Toad got to be a smart ass around Sabretooth. That made him a bit of a character, and not just a guy who could jump and flip around.

[Sailor Abbey]

I think they should make Darth Abbey, hidden apprentice of Darth Maul, who has millions of lightsabers. How does she do it? Well, right before combat begins, Darth Abbey wills the millions of midi-chlorians to jump from her body. At that moment, each of the millions of midi-chlorians whips out a microscopic lightsaber and attacks the enemy. The enemy instantly combusts from a millions of simultaneous microscopic lightsaber wounds. Some of the midi-chlorians may even have double-lightsabers or be dual-wielding lightsabers! Once the enemy is defeated, the midi-chlorians shut off their lightsabers and jump back into Darth Abbey's body. If you're reading this Lucas, I want my cut!

Sign me up.

Darth Maul was not an underused villain who would have been the coolest villain ever had he got the chance. How is this, you may ask? It is the simple fact that we can only judge him by what we saw. And what we saw was a guy who, while he seemed to have been able to hold his own, got killed after his second lightsabre duel.

Are you kidding? His character was obviously better fitted to survive that stupid duel. If you actually watch the scene where Obiwan slices him in half - DM basically stands there for a few seconds and waits for him to do it. That was totally retarded and unrealistic. The only reason an obviously superior martial arts master would have been killed in such a campy fashion is because GL was on the sidelines calling the shots.

[TruJade]

Yeah he was better suited to win the deul, but he was missing that special something...
LOL i don't know it's so riduculous....
Obi wan should've died especially since Qui Gon did.

But they needed Obi to continue the story and well they had
to come up with some way to kill the coolest sith since Vader .......
well actually before Vader but you know what i mean.

GL had to kill Maul cuz if he had lived longer he easily would've
been the Best SITH EVER and GL can't have his hero Anakin come second in anything.
Think about it.......

would you've rather had the Jake Llyod version of Anakin kill Darth Maul.
Me thinkith not