Lines you'd like to hear in Star Wars - Chefelf.com Night Life

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Lines you'd like to hear in Star Wars What it says.

#1 Helena

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Posted 22 October 2006 - 12:44 PM

"Many Gungans died to bring us this information."

"Master Jedi? Just for five minutes, will you ditch the pretentious high-fantasy speak and start talking like a normal human being?"

"Pardon the impertinence, Your Majesty, but what the fuck is that you're wearing?"

"Great news! New scientific evidence has conclusively proved that the entire 'Midichlorian' thing is utter bullshit. Now we can finally get rid of that useless little wanker Skywalker..."

"What? Make you a member of the Jedi Council, you little pipsqueak? HAHAHAHAHAHA..."

QUOTE

The sandpeople had women and children. We know this because Anakin killed them how could he tell? The children might be smaller but I never saw a sandperson with breasts. Did they hike their skirts and show him some leg or something?

QUOTE

Also, I can see the point of wanting to kidnap a human and use her as a slave, but they didn't. They tied her to a flimsy easel for a month. It's assumed they had to feed and give her water. What for? Was she purely ornamental? I can understand them wanting the droids, you can sell those for a lot of money, but a chick who's only skills are finding non-existand mushrooms and getting randomly pregnant, you're not going to get much.

- J m HofMarN on the Sand People

#2 flying dutchman

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Posted 22 October 2006 - 05:00 PM

(The First Death Star In orbit over the Ewok home world):"Fire at will commander!!!!

#3 miladyblue

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Posted 23 October 2006 - 01:39 AM

QUOTE

(The First Death Star In orbit over the Ewok home world):"Fire at will commander!!!!

Great one, Flying Dutchman! Here is another, along the same lines:

(The first Death Star in orbit over Naboo, geosynchronous over the Gungan portion) "Fire at will, Commander! But start slowly so the miserable bastards boil first!"

"Your Majesty, so many people would not have suffered and died had you deigned to stay in the same clothes for more than five minutes and we could have gotten to Coruscant that much faster!

#4 civilian_number_two

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Posted 24 October 2006 - 01:40 AM

QUOTE

Princess Leia: Let go.
Han Solo: Shh.
Princess Leia: Let go, please.
Han Solo: Don't get excited.
Princess Leia: Captain, being held by you isn't quite enough to get me excited.
Han Solo: Sorry sweetheart. I haven't got time for anything else.

Princess Leia: Hell, sure you do! Let's get it on!

(Cue synthesizer)

"I had a lot of different ideas. At one point, Luke, Leia and Ben were all going to be little people, and we did screen tests to see if we could do that." -George Lucas, in STAR WARS: the Annotated Screenplays (p197).

#5 diligent_d

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Posted 24 October 2006 - 12:21 PM

(Continuation...)

Princess Leia: Let go.
Han Solo: Shh.
Princess Leia: Let go, please.
Han Solo: Don't get excited.
Princess Leia: Captain, being held by you isn't quite enough to get me excited.
Han Solo: Sorry sweetheart. I haven't got time for anything else.
Princess Leia: Hell, sure you do! Let's get it on!
(Cue synthesizer)

(Glances and Winks into the Camera)
Hans Solo: Nice! I was getting tired of doing the old "hand solo" all the time.

#6 Storm

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Posted 24 October 2006 - 10:24 PM

After Luke gets into the X-Wing for the first time on Yavin.

LUKE: Hmmm..so many buttons. This may be problematic seeing as how I have never flown this ship before or received even a millisecond of training. Let's see....what does this button do?
X-WING COMPUTER: Self-Destruct Sequence Activated

BOOM!

Luke is dead.

That's what should have happened....

This post has been edited by Storm: 24 October 2006 - 10:26 PM

#7 civilian_number_two

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Posted 25 October 2006 - 02:08 AM

QUOTE (Storm @ Oct 24 2006, 10:24 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Jeez ... we're back to this again?

a ) The ASTROMECH droid (in this case R2D2) supplied with each ship supplied all the navigation, while the pilot supplies the refelxes. This is the explanation offered by the film itself, so you wouldn't try to make sense of people in the STAR WARS universe being able to pilot anything.

b ) it's not serious science fiction, so your objections are silly. Care to question how physics explains the Force?

-------

(Continuation)

C3P0: Captain, I am fluent in six million forms of ...
Han: Shut up, goldenrod!
Leia: No, wait ...

#8 diligent_d

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Posted 25 October 2006 - 02:17 AM

QUOTE (Storm @ Oct 24 2006, 11:24 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

*wank wank*

#9 Helena

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Posted 25 October 2006 - 07:46 AM

You know, I don't know about anyone else, but personally I'm this close to just hitting the 'ignore user' button on Storm.

QUOTE

- J m HofMarN on the Sand People

#10 TruJade

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Posted 25 October 2006 - 01:30 PM

Hahahaha Oh Helena you are hilarious
But back to the task
this should be in episode six
hands down.

Han: You love him, don't you?
Leia:Of course i do,but...
Han: Well then u sholud be with him.
Leia: No! No. Han he's my brother.
Han: Oh... so i guess a threesome is out of the question,huh?

Duct tape is like the force....

There's a lightside, a darkside

and it holds everything together

There are too many people in the world...We need another plague -Dwight K. Shrute [The Office]

#11 Jordan

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Posted 25 October 2006 - 02:59 PM

Scene From ROTS

Skywalker: I'm so evil and corrupted by dark side power

Palpatine: No you're not

Skywalker: I know.

Palpatine: ....

Skywalker: I'm soo sorry <3 : (

This post has been edited by Jordan: 25 October 2006 - 03:00 PM

Oh SMEG. What the smeggity smegs has smeggins done? He smeggin killed me. - Lister of Smeg, space bum

#12 Storm

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Posted 25 October 2006 - 08:49 PM

It's amazing how most people can dish it out on the PT in the most absurd fashion possible, but can't take even a slight joke aimed towards the OT.

Here's another one anyways....

(When the Avenger is chasing the Falcon)

NEEDA: They're moving into attack position.

NEEDA: Shields up!

NEEDA: Track them! They may come around for another pass.

IMPERIAL OFFICER: Captain Needa, the ship has just passed the top part of the command tower.

(10 seconds later) They are now moving to the backside of the tower.

(20 seconds later) They have quietly landed on the backside of the command tower.

NEEDA: Dispatch 100 Tie Fighters.

This post has been edited by Storm: 25 October 2006 - 08:53 PM

#13 civilian_number_two

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Posted 26 October 2006 - 01:17 AM

QUOTE (Storm @ Oct 25 2006, 08:49 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

It's amazing how most people can dish it out on the PT in the most absurd fashion possible, but can't take even a slight joke aimed towards the OT.

Hmm. Hence the jokes about porn and the OT.

You see, the things you're saying are justrehashes of arguments from another topic. They're not actually "jokes," you know, with punchlines.

But believe what you like about people.

#14 Despondent

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Posted 26 October 2006 - 01:39 AM

"I have a bad feeling about something."

#15 miladyblue

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Posted 26 October 2006 - 08:40 AM

Han: You love him, don't you?
Leia:Of course i do,but...
Han: Well then u should be with him. Me, I found I like dumpy opinionated broads, and there's one who has the hots for me and has promised to be my love slave.

I can dream, can't I?