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Suggested changes to the OT For the next Special Editions...

#16 User is offline   SithAvenger Icon

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Posted 11 May 2006 - 06:48 PM

Hahaha. Great thread.

ESB:
Han Freezing Scene

Vader: Wow, 3-PO! I missed you man!
Luke enters
Luke: Leia, we can't be in love because we're the sons of Vader! Oh screw this, I love you.
Boba Fett enters
Boba: Yo, Stormtroopers, you're all my clones! Let's party!
Yoda enters
Yoda: Chewbacca! Long time no see!
3-PO: I hate living in the smallest galaxy in the fucking universe.
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#17 User is offline   barend Icon

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Posted 11 May 2006 - 07:02 PM

'long time no see' is the one common saying that sounds like something yoda would say...
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Posted 11 May 2006 - 07:22 PM

ANH
Obi and Luke discover the uncles bodies.

Obi: This was done by the ''precise'' shots of Stormtroopers...
Luke: Stortroopers? Aiming precise shots? I want whatever you are smoking.
Obi: Well, they killed a lot of Jedi, mainly because we couldn't sense a plot involving the whole fuckin army we were running.
Luke: But why do they suck now? Do clones screw over if you don't lybricate them or something?
Obi: Does it matter? We aren't going to a battle station full of stormtroopers, stupid kid.
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Posted 11 May 2006 - 09:20 PM

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Posted 11 May 2006 - 09:29 PM

BEN: And these blast points, too accurate for Sandpeople. Only
Imperial stormtroopers are so precise.

LUKE: Why would Imperial troops want to slaughter Jawas?

BEN: I don't know, i haven't seen so many little corpses lying around since your father killed a temple full of children! Remeber that one R2?

R2D2: beep booop burrr beep (nodding)

LUKE: what was that?
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Posted 11 May 2006 - 09:43 PM

QUOTE (barend @ May 11 2006, 11:29 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
BEN: And these blast points, too accurate for Sandpeople. Only
Imperial stormtroopers are so precise.

LUKE: Why would Imperial troops want to slaughter Jawas?

BEN: I don't know, i haven't seen so many little corpses lying around since your father killed a temple full of children! Remeber that one R2?

R2D2: beep booop burrr beep (nodding)

LUKE: what was that?


Luke: Hey, didn't you say that you never recall of seeing that droid?
Obi: Godamn kids these days. They no longer respect old people.

This post has been edited by SithAvenger: 11 May 2006 - 09:43 PM

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#22 User is offline   barend Icon

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Posted 11 May 2006 - 09:56 PM

hehe
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#23 User is offline   SithAvenger Icon

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Posted 11 May 2006 - 10:10 PM

Thanks for liking my comedic skills. (Or were you just finding a way to have more posts?)

ANH:
Vader vs Obi scene

Obi: Vader if you strike me down, my corpse will disappear and I will be a...GHOST!
Vader: Then why did every fuckin Jedi had his corpse in the floor?
Obi: Uh.... the force did it.
*vader strkies obi*
Obi: Godamn it, I'm afraid of ghosts!
Luke: NOOOOO!
Vader: You call that shouting? I'll show you, you little pussy.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Luke: Wow. Impressive. Most impressive.
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#24 User is offline   barend Icon

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Posted 12 May 2006 - 01:15 AM

ESB

VADER: Apology accepted general Sleezebaganno.
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Posted 12 May 2006 - 01:46 AM

laugh.gif laugh.gif laugh.gif Great stuff, all of you.

ANH

Obi: And these blast points, too accurate for Sandpeople. Only
Imperial stormtroopers are so precise.
Luke: Uhhhhhh~~~...
Obi: What?
Luke: Nothing, just some force-vision about a group of Imperial stormtroopers being beaten up by ewoks.

Quote

Pop quiz, hotshot. Garry Kasparov is coming to kill you, and the only way to change his mind is for you to beat him at chess. What do you do, what do you do?
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Posted 12 May 2006 - 02:03 AM

QUOTE (barend @ May 12 2006, 03:15 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
ESB

VADER: Apology accepted general Sleezebaganno.



Sleezebaganno: Wanna buy some deathsticks?
Vader: Wanna get your ass kicked?
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Posted 12 May 2006 - 08:14 AM

laugh.gif
QUOTE (barend @ May 11 2006, 10:29 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
BEN: And these blast points, too accurate for Sandpeople. Only
Imperial stormtroopers are so precise.

LUKE: Why would Imperial troops want to slaughter Jawas?

BEN: I don't know, i haven't seen so many little corpses lying around since your father killed a temple full of children! Remeber that one R2?

R2D2: beep booop burrr beep (nodding)

LUKE: what was that?


laugh.gif laugh.gif laugh.gif

crying.gif

laugh.gif laugh.gif laugh.gif

OMG thats too much! laugh.gif
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#28 User is offline   SithAvenger Icon

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Posted 12 May 2006 - 05:12 PM

ROTJ

Luke: Leia, why are you a princess? Your mom is senator.
Leia: I remember from the long time that I spent with my real mom that she was a queen.
Luke: But I've heard that Padme Amidala was a senator too.
Leia: Would you shut up if we call you Prince Luke?
Luke: Dibs on the Alderaan palace.
Leia: But it was destro-... Ok, you take it.
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Posted 12 May 2006 - 06:19 PM

Barend, just need to say...

Your sloganizer at this very moment is awesome.
Want a Tarot reading?

PM me, we'll talk.
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#30 User is offline   Storm Icon

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Posted 12 May 2006 - 08:59 PM

They need to add a scene in ANH where after the Rebels are briefed by General Dodonna, Luke gets into his X-wing and instantly crashes into the hanger bay wall and dies. Following this, Han comments "I told him it wasn't like dusting crops" and Dodonna concludes "Oohhhh...so that's why we don't put untrained pilots into a space ship. I get it now!"

This post has been edited by Storm: 12 May 2006 - 09:09 PM

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