Chefelf.com Night Life: Paintshop Penis Portrayal Punch-up - Chefelf.com Night Life

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Paintshop Penis Portrayal Punch-up The greatest contest. EVER.

#1 User is offline   J m HofMarN Icon

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Posted 17 September 2005 - 04:12 AM

It's always been a well known fact that Slade isn't as good at drawing penises on paintshop as I am. It hardly even needed to be said, it's simply unspoken knowledge, just like the fact that Chylde is evil. Wheras most children might ask why the sky is blue, I expect my offspring to one day approach me and say "Why does uncle Slade suck at drawing peepees so much? It makes me sad."

However, Slade, unwilling to admit to his own inferiority, had to start trouble, as is his wont. He was previewing the phenomenal LAZER STORM: Episode 3, when we began this conversation:

QUOTE
Haunted Ethos: But I have to ask: Have you ever actually seen a penis? :-P
ProjectV01: have you ever tried to draw one with photoshop
Haunted Ethos: Hmm...
ProjectV01: its an elongated oval with two sort of round things, that's a phallic symbol if not a proper representation
Haunted Ethos: My photoshop penis is way better looking than yours, I'm sorry.
ProjectV01: hey when its buried in dime hooker it dosnt matter how it looks
ProjectV01: I smell contest
Haunted Ethos: Nope, because you can't see it, and you know it's going to fall off soon anyway.
ProjectV01: FUCK YES. HELL FUCK YES!
Haunted Ethos: Hehe!
Haunted Ethos: You couldn't possibly be thinking...
ProjectV01: a photoshop penis drawing contest
Haunted Ethos: You are.
Haunted Ethos: :-P
ProjectV01: whoever draws the best male genitalia with paintshop wins
Haunted Ethos: You're on.
Haunted Ethos: I'll make a proper one tomorrow.
Haunted Ethos: But I need to go to bed.
ProjectV01: haha
ProjectV01: peace
Haunted Ethos: And make an announcement on the forums, lets get lots of entries.
Haunted Ethos: And we can give all of the entries pretentious art critiques!
Haunted Ethos: G'night.
ProjectV01: good show old chum!


So, you see, Slade and I are both complete lunatics.

In other news though, we decided to open our little contest to the pubic, ermmm, public. The rules are simple:

You can only use the regular old paintshop, no fancy bullshit.

You cannot use an actual picture of a penis. It has to be drawn.

You cannot ask your parents for help. Mainly because they will have you institutionalized.

If you make someone else join or endorse the contest you get one vote automaticly in your favor.

Get your entries remotely hosted ON www.imageshack.us or something and post them here. When they're all in I'll set up a poll to vote on which is the best. Artistic criticism (constructive if possible, negative if necessary, and sarcasm is mandatory) is welcome.

All entries must be in by the time I decide they should be in, which will depend on how I feel at the specific time. For instance, it's already too late for Slade to make an entry. My entry will be appearing in the new article in the third graph.

Anyhow, good luck with this fucked up contest.

Quote

I don't know about you but I have never advocated that homosexuals, for any reason, be cut out of their mother's womb and thrown into a bin.
- Deucaon toes a hard line on gay fetus rights.
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#2 User is offline   scubasteve4lyfe Icon

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Posted 17 September 2005 - 05:58 AM

We're allowed to say penis?

Submission tomorrow, perhaps.
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#3 User is offline   Otal Nimrodi Icon

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Posted 17 September 2005 - 07:19 AM

QUOTE (scubasteve4lyfe @ Sep 17 2005, 05:58 AM)
We're allowed to say penis?


I'd say it isn't the worst thing I saw on this.
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#4 User is offline   Icey Icon

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Posted 17 September 2005 - 12:36 PM

I demand that Photoshop will be allowed because Paintshop is the spunk fo Satan.

Thank you.
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#5 User is offline   Slade Icon

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Posted 17 September 2005 - 12:38 PM

To clarify, he means MS Paint or a rudimentary equivilent, not actually Paintshop...

And I'm submitting anyway. Douchebag. biggrin.gif
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#6 User is offline   Icey Icon

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Posted 17 September 2005 - 12:49 PM

Oh yeah, well


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#7 User is offline   J m HofMarN Icon

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Posted 17 September 2005 - 01:07 PM

Take that back ye lilly livered rapscallion! rargh!

Icey- That truly is a masterpiece of digital weinerization. It cries out to me in its silence, and the nuances of its subtle message would be lost if I tried to put it into words. Your paintshop penis brings tears to my eyes.

Quote

I don't know about you but I have never advocated that homosexuals, for any reason, be cut out of their mother's womb and thrown into a bin.
- Deucaon toes a hard line on gay fetus rights.
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#8 User is offline   Slade Icon

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Posted 17 September 2005 - 01:12 PM

Are you sure those are tears in your eyes? *cough*
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#9 User is offline   floppydisk Icon

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Posted 17 September 2005 - 02:58 PM

Ha ha, I'll get one in tommorow... Maybe later tonight.
QUOTE (Theodor Herzl)
If you will it, it is no dream.
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#10 User is offline   scubasteve4lyfe Icon

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Posted 17 September 2005 - 03:44 PM



An unfortunate penis. Loved by no one.
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#11 User is offline   Otal Nimrodi Icon

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Posted 17 September 2005 - 04:16 PM

Methinks Icey's was better.
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#12 User is offline   SimeSublime Icon

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Posted 18 September 2005 - 07:49 AM



Just out of interest, I modeled it off this image I found in Google Image search.

This post has been edited by SimeSublime: 18 September 2005 - 07:50 AM

The Green Knight, SimeSublime the Puffinesque, liker of chips and hunter of gnomes.
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#13 User is offline   J m HofMarN Icon

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Posted 18 September 2005 - 12:48 PM

Wow, he looks just like a supreme dipshit, as I always envisioned him.

Quote

I don't know about you but I have never advocated that homosexuals, for any reason, be cut out of their mother's womb and thrown into a bin.
- Deucaon toes a hard line on gay fetus rights.
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#14 User is offline   NinevriseAV Icon

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Posted 18 September 2005 - 01:44 PM



I vote for icey's. But how could I not contribute? Here's my drawing.
Hammer/Publick 2012! WHITEHOUSE GO!
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#15 User is offline   Jane Sherwood Icon

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Posted 18 September 2005 - 01:47 PM

You know what...I want to be a part of this. I should have a picture of a cock drawn in MS Paint up later tonight.
Check out my crappy drawings!

Chyld is an ignorant slut.

QUOTE
"I don't have to conform to the vagaries of time and space; I'm a loony, for God's sake!"
- Campbell Bean (David Tennant), Takin' Over the Asylum, 1994
XD
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