[J m HofMarN]

As part of the general forum penchant for making much Ado about nothing I'd like to warn the forum that WE ARE BEING INVADED AND DEATH IS CERTAIN!!!!! Just earlier today everything was going fine and we were all posting happily. Then Rhubarb came nad like posted a gazillion things and everything is fucked now and WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!

Sime was the first one to notice. He called it "amusing" in the same way that I was amused when the pentagon got blown up. Yeah, so in that sense THIS COULD BE LIKENED TO A TERRORIST ATTACK.

And the results are clear. It is now 2:16 AM eastern time and the forums are totally abandoned. This could be because it is 2:16 AM. It could also be because WE HAVE BEEN INVADED BY RHUBARB AND DEATH IS CERTAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

All the old guard are gone. Slade, Sime, Floppydisk, Ninja Duck, all gone. Apparently THEY COULD NOT STAND THE STRAIN OF THIS INVASION. Are they still alive at all? I don't know. I. DON'T. KNOW. You see, Rhubarb is new to this forum. And though she might not mean to completely destroy everything like some sort of rampaging... Australian... girl... thing, she is.

Newbies always do this anytime they come. Anything that goes wrong is blamed on them. It's a little known fact that Emanuel Goldstein was a newby on the BigBrother.oce forums before becoming the reviled villain of so many two minute hates.

Anyhow, like I said, I now pronounce this forum to have been TOTALLY SLAIN by newbies. The unstoppable tide cannot be brooked. What can men do against such reckless hate? My only recourse is to commit honorable sepuku in the face of this unstoppable destruction.

I highly encourage everyone to panic and start reminiscing about the golden age of the Jelly Pufflemur forums, which according to my calculations occured about a week ago. Anyone who wants to yell angrily at the newbies can do so in this thread as well. Damn newbies! They're taking all our jobs!

I have provided links to all of the newby posts on this forum so that people can see exaclty how much they are COMPLETELY KILLING EVERYONE AND RAPING PUPPIES!

Here it is, all of Rhubarb's posts linked in one easy click.

BLARGH BLARGH IT IS TOO TERRIBLE TO LOOK UPON LIKE THE ARC OF THE COVENANT IN INDIANA JONES AND MY FACE IS MELTING LIKE A NAZI BLAAARAAAARGH

PS: I only realized after writing this that I actually had a comic I could have put up. Fear not though, despite the fact that everyone remotely involved with this site is incompetent I will have a review of Six String Samurai tomorrow and theres a multi part article coming.

This post has been edited by J m HofMarN: 17 June 2005 - 01:40 AM

[Rhubarb]

[J m HofMarN]

BLAAAARGH! The invasion continues! Pants wetting and arm flailing is in order!!!!!!!!!

[floppydisk]

*flails arms, then remembers he's a pirate*

Yarr, we'll not stand fer this! Man the defenses!

*fires cannon*

[MacGyver's Mullet]

ONWARDS NATIONAL LEPRECHAUN ARMY!

BOW YE TO THE NEWBS!

[Chyld]

But what if I neither stand for commie leprechauns, newbs, or pirates?

[J m HofMarN]

Ahhh! Another newby to the forums! What the hell is going on! AAAAAAAHHHH!

-Draws sword and stands atop the ramparts with FD-

WE SHALL FIGHT TO THE LAST! YAR!

[floppydisk]

Load the buckshot, ye worthless dogs!

[Emu]

Whuh? Aren't we all sort of newbies on this particular forum?

Oh well, I certainly don't mind any opportunity to explode things. *Lights the cannon fuse and stands back*

[SimeSublime]

*Sticks the dagger into Slades back, then joins the Leprachaun army*

[Emu]

Agh! Backstabber! But I guess it makes sense in a way, since you are green. And so are the Leprechauns.

[SimeSublime]

They're heavy drinking communists, and you expect me to fight against them?

This post has been edited by SimeSublime: 18 June 2005 - 03:50 AM

[J m HofMarN]

kill the traitor!

And yeah, we are all newbies, I was just kind of satirizing people who say newbies are ruining the forums.

[SimeSublime]

I may fall, but the workers will rise, capatilist pig-dog!

[Rhubarb]

*kills everyone*

*wins*