78 Reasons to Hate Episode I The Phantom Menace articles...
Posted 07 June 2005 - 02:52 PM
78 Reasons to Hate: Star Wars: Episode I: The Phantom Menace
This article first ran on Lance & Eskimo in 2001.
Post all comments here.
Posted 07 June 2005 - 06:00 PM
Yes. And I should be moving all old topics here as well.
Yes, sir. Wait for it. A great Jedi once said, "I say, 'Patience.'"
Posted 25 September 2005 - 07:22 PM
The Trade Federation
This yawner hits you early on while the classic introductory text is still scrolling up.
Turmoil has engulfed the
Galactic Republic. The taxation
of trade routes to outlying star
systems is in dispute.
Huh? Trade routes? What kinda plot is that? This sounds more like some boring course in American History than the plot for a Science Fiction movie. Isn't this what started the War of 1812? Is Andrew Jackson going to be in this movie? The trade Federation is never fully explained either. If they are indeed a Trade Federation then why do they have an army? And why do they have a seat in the senate? And why do they have a "Viceroy"? This leads me to my next problem...
Lucas uses visuals to tell the story instead of heavy dialogue:
1.)They have an army for the same reason Jabba the Hutt has guards. You know protection.
2.)Trade Federation = Corrupt capitalists
Trade Federation seat on Galactic Senate = Corrupt Senate
3.)Sounds better than C.E.O.
Posted 10 July 2007 - 01:33 PM
(1) The Queen is warned that Naboo has no chance against the trade federation's "battle-hardened" army. If I could pick one adjective that does NOT describe a robot army, much less the brittle and confused robot army portrayed in the movie, "battle-hardened" would be near the top of the list.
(2) Before the big battle, Palpatine (in his Sith garb) tells the Federation archbishops (or whatever their title is) to "wipe them all out" or "kill them" with a malicious tone. So, presumably the robot army has one standing order -- kill them all. What happens instead? All Gungans are taken prisoner! What? Someone should have told George Lucas you can't have your cake and eat it too, but no. The Sith gets to look super-evil, and most of the good guys get to survive. Yay!
(3) The Queen issues the vote of no confidence in the Senate. Um, I didn't take a government course in college, but I'm pretty sure a SENATOR needs to do that, not one ruler of one people group on one planet in the senator's jurisdiction. If I'm wrong, does that mean the Boss Nass frog guy could have done the same thing? Bizarre.
This post has been edited by rhino: 10 July 2007 - 01:34 PM
Posted 10 July 2007 - 05:47 PM
Posted 10 July 2007 - 07:59 PM
Posted 09 December 2007 - 06:47 PM
After Anakin stops being an idiot and figures out that never seeing his mother again means that he's never going to see his mother again, there is a touching mother and son scene that leads to a heart wrenching 24 second pouting sequence after which Anakin entirely forgets his mother ever existed. He also ditches C-3P0 and is pretty much a total asshole about it, not being sad at all about stranding his "robot buddy" on Tatooine.
But seriously, I loved the Phantom Menace...I'll always have a soft spot for that one. I watched it as a child and I loved it and I still love it to this day. really hyped up movie and it probably didn't live up to all the hype but I loved it anyway.
This post has been edited by Executioner: 09 December 2007 - 07:07 PM