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Episode III Reasons, Pt. 1 Tall in the saddle, we ride again.

#1 User is offline   T.MaskedRebutter Icon

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Posted 07 June 2005 - 02:40 PM

Hi, all. Doctor X back again, using this name til the Password Recovery thing sorts out. As always, these are my thoughts on Chefelf's reasons. Sometimes disputing, sometimes agreeing with my own perspective. Please, no wagering.


Reason #1
There are heroes on both sides. Who exactly are the heroes on the other side? Count Dooku? Nute Gunray? Presumably the other side's hero was that battle droid that said "Roger, roger!"


Recall that The One Who Shall Unite All Mankind was made a general for...well, desecrating his people's sacred place by bringing in outsiders. The proto-Rebellion needs heroes and needs them quickly, hence the "Throw a rock at an AT-AT and you're a general" policy still in effect by Return of the Jedi. There probably ARE a few droid heroes on their side. I just wish we'd seen some of that. "C'mon, boys! We're taking that hill because #ZZ48395 would have WANTED us to!"

Reason #2
Opening Battle
The space battle that opens Revenge of the Sith is impressive but meaningless.

Not entirely. If you're going to make the first sentence of your words-in-space "War!" You'd better show me some fuckin' war pretty quick. God knows if they'd panned down to Amidala's apartment and her and Anakin talking about baby names, I'd have walked out.

Reason #3
X-Wing Precursors (Two Wings Are Better Than Three)

I actually think this is a pretty neat part of the prequels. Back in the days of the Republic, starship designers did things like make a ship look like a teardrop or like it's flying backwards. (Always thought the Naboo Starfighters should be pointing the other way.) In the next films, we'll see starship design influenced by the yoke of fascism. Function rather than fashion, so the extra wings go the way of fins and rumble seats.

Reason #4
We all know Lucas has lifted plot elements from Kurosawa, classic mythology and elsewhere, but I was rather surprised to see this particular plot point taken directly from the Nintendo game Starfox 64.

Or every other video game made. Except maybe Smash T.V. Otherwise, R2 would have destroyed the droid, the smoke clears, and then he has to fight the droid's head on tank treads. (Say it with me now: "Big Money! Big Prizes! I LOVE IT!!!")

Reason #5
R2 Leaps Out of Ship
In Episode IV, they require a complex arrangement of cranes and suction pumps to insert and remove their R2 units from their ships. Perhaps this is part of the technological dark ages that typically follow the beginning of an empire. You know, those kind of dark ages.

Yeah, aren't wars supposed to bring about ADVANCES in technology? Otherwise, the scientist in Civilization would come out and say "Sire, Mongol Wise Men have forgotten the secret of Combustion!" (Side note: I'd always heard you could rename the technological discoveries in the game and had a list of ones I wanted to replace them with, but never succeeded in doing it. So sadly, the Greek Wise Men will never learn the secrets of Rock N' Roll, Ice Cubes, Dressing For Success, Platetectonics, or A Good 10-Cent Cigar.)

Reason #6
Chancellor's Signal?
When Obi-Wan and Anakin crash-land on the General's ship, R2-D2 find's the "chancellor's signal." It is unclear exactly what signal the chancellor is emitting that helps Obi-Wan and Anakin follow him.

Republic Wise Men have discovered the secret of Lo-Jacking Our Chancellor.

Reason #7
R2 Cell Phone
As Obi-Wan and Anakin are going to rescue the chancellor, Obi-Wan gives Artoo his cell phone. This gives Obi-Wan the ability to be one of those annoying cell phone users who utilizes the walkie-talkie feature to communicate obsessively with Artoo.

Good point here. R2 is an astromech droid, designed to go out and walk around outside in the vacuum to do repairs in flight. One would think an internal communicator would be part of his standard equipment. No, this was thrown in so Lucas could do some obstacle stacking. (If you don't know what I mean by "obstacle stacking," go back and watch any of the Indiana jones films again.)

Reason #8
Droid I.Q.

Don't dispute the Super Battle Droid's use of language. I just think it was just a mistake on Count Dooku's part to use them for security guards. That sounds like something you delegate down to the regular Battle Droids and leave your Super models for actual battling. How do you get to be leader of a multi-planetary resistance without figuring out "Let these things designed for assault do the assaulting and leave the shining flashlights down corridors and harassing intruders for the guys who say Roger Roger a lot?"

Reason #9
General Grievous

I guess General Grievous is explained in more depth (including his robo-bronchitis) in the Clone Wars cartoons, but the last time someone tricked me into watching the cartoon version of their film was the 1/3rd of an episode of the Highlander cartoon series, and ain't nobody playing me like that again. (Save you some time: Remember the lame stuff about GI Joe? Like how everyone would make it safely out of the tank before it exploded or the plane would blow up and then we'd see two little parachutes? The cartoon was kinda like that, which is an EXTRA BAD thing when one of your universe's rules is "YOU MUST CUT OFF THE HEADS OF YOUR ENEMIES!")

Reason #10
R2-D2 Kicks Ass

Again, agreement here. I'll buy the "R2 knows how to use his tools defensively" bit, but the Super Battle Droid's weakness being fire? Doesn't strike me as very super.
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#2 User is offline   Trigormike Icon

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Posted 08 June 2005 - 06:22 PM

Howzit
I'm new on these forum things so bear with me.
I am one of the thousands bitterly appalled by Episode 3. There are so many reasons for a once proud Star Wars fan to be annoyed that I can't remember them all off the top of my head, so I'll add 'em as I remember 'em. Shame I can only read Reasons 1-10 on the site.

Surely the vulture droids on the Jedi's ships could have been thrown off by using the Force. Instead Obi-Wan only seems to use it to close doors and other pointless tasks(As for video game rip-offs the initial battle scenes are very similar to the arcade game Starblade).
In fact in the prequels all the Jedis' abilities seem fairly crap considering this was their heyday. Maybe there is only a certain amount of Force to go around.
I had expected a sort of wandering samurai thing going on, but for the majority of the films the only time you see any other Jedi they are sitting around talking. No wonder Darth Sidious could personally kill about five of them single-handed, the idle gits.

Six-winged fighters?
Everyone knows that the prototype for the X-wing was the Z95 headhunter!


Padme dies because she wants to?
Surely Star Wars medical technology could have kept her alive. Maybe med-droids don't take the hypocritic oath or she was allergic to bacta.

Vader Frankenstein.
'NOOOOOOOOOO!!!' My reaction was similar.

Obi-wan's battle stance.
Why did he suddenly start doing that?

Younglings??????
Lava planet.
No one seems affected by the heat of the molten rock about three feet away.

Obi-wan. Merciful Jedi.
Your best mate has had both his legs hacked off and he's been terribly burnt and is now dying in agony. What do you do? A) Put him out of his misery with a quick beheading or, cool.gif walk off and leave him to it, there's a good band playing at the local cantina.
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