Chefelf.com Night Life: Classic Troll VS Plastic Troll - Chefelf.com Night Life

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Classic Troll VS Plastic Troll Monster takes on midget.

Poll: Who would win in a fight between a mythological scandinavian monster and an annoying plastic novelty?

Who would win in a fight between a mythological scandinavian monster and an annoying plastic novelty?

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#16 User is offline   Rhubarb Icon

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Posted 10 May 2005 - 05:08 AM

QUOTE (Voodoo dog @ May 10 2005, 04:52 AM)
Who would win in a fight?(Assuming it was underwater) The piranah!  Tiger would be literal mincemeat in about 10 minutes.
Actually, I think the tiger would probably not notice the pirhana. The skin of a tiger, along with that coat, is pretty thick. A hundred pirhanas and you've maybe got something there.

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This post has been edited by Rhubarb: 10 May 2005 - 05:09 AM

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#17 User is offline   SimeSublime Icon

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Posted 10 May 2005 - 08:02 AM

Even then, pirhana's very rarely go into a feeding frenzy.

And how do you know the plastic trolls are fast? Just because they're small, doesn't mean they're nimble. They strike me as a bit flabby to be doing much in the way of physical activity.
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#18 User is offline   floppydisk Icon

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Posted 10 May 2005 - 03:27 PM

Ah, but how quickly your own theory turns against you. If plastic trolls literally cannot be malformed by classic trolls, then how do you expect them to move at all? If they are indeed made out of hard rubber unbending indestructible palstic, how do you expect them to bend thier own joints, when a thing 500 times stronger than them can't?

This post has been edited by floppydisk: 10 May 2005 - 03:28 PM

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#19 User is offline   Jane Sherwood Icon

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Posted 10 May 2005 - 04:29 PM

In regards to the troll movie:

Dear sweet god that's scary...and I thought Oompa Loompas were traumatizing as a little kid, I am so happy I never encountered that monstrosity.
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#20 User is offline   floppydisk Icon

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Posted 10 May 2005 - 04:34 PM

Oh, yeah. I came across that article a while back, while I was searching at Seanbaby's site, and have never been the same since. I laughed so hard I was crying. Then I had nightmares.
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Posted 11 May 2005 - 04:16 AM

I'm going to reiterate my first point.

Squishyflatten.

SQUISHYFLATTEN.

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#22 User is offline   Voodoo Dog Icon

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Posted 11 May 2005 - 08:18 AM

QUOTE (floppydisk @ May 10 2005, 09:27 PM)
Ah, but how quickly your own theory turns against you. If plastic trolls literally cannot be malformed by classic trolls, then how do you expect them to move at all? If they are indeed made out of hard rubber unbending indestructible palstic, how do you expect them to bend thier own joints, when a thing 500 times stronger than them can't?


If you are going by the laws of physics on this one, classic fares no better. TROLLS ARE TRADITIONALLY MADE FROM ROCK. Living rock by night, inanimate rock by day. Rock can't bend and flex like flesh and muscle, even if it is alive. In the real world classic would be immobile. Stalemate, unless you are prepared to think of this as a fantasy setting, in which case you would actually have a chance at winning.

And plastic would be fast. Practically all small mammals are. They need to be. Otherwise they would get eaten. They can also be vicious little buggers. They attack quick, using the initial confusion as an advantage, then retreat and do it again. MY GUY WOULD WIN I TELLS YA!!!!
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#23 User is offline   Rhubarb Icon

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Posted 11 May 2005 - 08:39 AM

Dude, Plastic Troll doesn't gotta fight. He just has to lie there and wait until Classic Troll dies of old age and crumbles away. He's nonbiodegradable!
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#24 User is offline   Jane Sherwood Icon

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Posted 11 May 2005 - 10:17 AM

Why, why, why, why, WHY the hell did I watch those clips..?

(*shudder*)

Those songs! They're stuck in my head! THEY'RE STUCK IN MY HEAD!

This post has been edited by Jane Sherwood: 11 May 2005 - 10:20 AM

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#25 User is offline   Rhubarb Icon

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Posted 11 May 2005 - 12:26 PM



Aww man. Looking at these damn things makes me want one all over again. Would you believe I never had a Troll Doll when I was a kid? My parents thought they were too gimmicky. Fuckin' hippies. I had some green-haired aborted-foetus one that went on the end of a pencil, and a tiny pink-haired one with a gaping hole in his back where the fridge magnet fell out. THAT WAS ALL. Fuck. I'm so totally buying myself a Troll Doll next Christmas. My family gets NOTHING, because they oppressed my Troll-owning freedom. >:(
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#26 User is offline   Jane Sherwood Icon

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Posted 11 May 2005 - 12:38 PM

Aaaaaaaaaaaah! ohmy.gif

It's freaky!
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Chyld is an ignorant slut.

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#27 User is offline   Rhubarb Icon

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Posted 11 May 2005 - 12:47 PM

It's adorable. :(

It's also now my MSN avatar! I spread Trollish joy!

This post has been edited by Rhubarb: 11 May 2005 - 12:48 PM

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#28 User is offline   Jane Sherwood Icon

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Posted 11 May 2005 - 01:02 PM

I can think of many different things to call that. "Adorable" is not one of them... ermm.gif

This post has been edited by Jane Sherwood: 11 May 2005 - 01:12 PM

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Chyld is an ignorant slut.

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#29 User is offline   floppydisk Icon

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Posted 11 May 2005 - 01:19 PM

QUOTE (Voodoo dog @ May 11 2005, 08:18 AM)
If you are going by the laws of physics on this one, classic fares no better.  TROLLS ARE TRADITIONALLY MADE FROM ROCK.  Living rock by night, inanimate rock by day.  Rock can't bend and flex like flesh and muscle, even if it is alive.  In the real world classic would be immobile.  Stalemate, unless you are prepared to think of this as a fantasy setting, in which case you would actually have a chance at winning.

And plastic would be fast.  Practically all small mammals are.  They need to be.  Otherwise they would get eaten.  They can also be vicious little buggers.  They attack quick, using the initial confusion as an advantage, then retreat and do it again.  MY GUY WOULD WIN I TELLS YA!!!!


As for paragraph one; trolls are not made of rock. They're skin is like rock, meaning tough and leathery. And are we going by Tolkien rules, because in his world they're descended from Ents.

As for paragraph two; Didn't you listen to my post? Even in fantasy, they can't move. They're plastic. If you magically took one into middle-earth, it would still be plastic.
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#30 User is offline   Rhubarb Icon

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Posted 11 May 2005 - 01:22 PM

QUOTE (floppydisk @ May 11 2005, 01:19 PM)
As for paragraph two; Didn't you listen to my post? Even in fantasy, they can't move. They're plastic. If you magically took one into middle-earth, it would still be plastic.

Well, you obviously didn't 'listen' to my post...

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Dude, Plastic Troll doesn't gotta fight. He just has to lie there and wait until Classic Troll dies of old age and crumbles away. He's nonbiodegradable!

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