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Charlie And The Chocolate Factory OMGWTF!?

#16 User is offline   Voodoo Dog Icon

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Posted 04 May 2005 - 10:40 PM

QUOTE (Jane Sherwood @ May 5 2005, 04:23 AM)
VD, tell me...what the hell are you on, man?


Why I'm on wub.gif for you dear girl! I'm on Love for my Sweet Darling! I'm on LSD!

Oh you got something for me sweet sweet darling? Thank you so much. You really shouldn't have. What is it? It looks like a can of...mace. What are you doing? WHAT ARE YOU FUCKING DOING?!?!? ARAAAGGH!!! MY EYES!!!! MY EYES!!!!!

Thud.

Oh and by the way, I was only joking.

Or was I?

OR WAS I?!?!?!?

BWA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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#17 User is offline   Jane Sherwood Icon

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Posted 04 May 2005 - 10:42 PM

Something tells me I should be royally pissed off about this...but it's just too damn funny.

Oh well. And believe me, if I took all that seriously, you would soon find yourself in a state where you would have about as much sexual desire as my cat Tom.




He's neutered.

(*continues gleefully spraying VD with mace*)

This post has been edited by Jane Sherwood: 04 May 2005 - 10:46 PM

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Chyld is an ignorant slut.

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#18 User is offline   rock_dash Icon

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Posted 04 May 2005 - 11:08 PM

QUOTE (Jane Sherwood @ May 4 2005, 07:42 PM)
Something tells me I should be royally pissed off about this...but it's just too damn funny.

Oh well.  And believe me, if I took all that seriously, you would soon find yourself in a state where you would have about as much sexual desire as my cat Tom.
He's neutered.

(*continues gleefully spraying VD with mace*)


I'm still laughing as I type this! biggrin.gif

*passes out from lack of air*
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Oh God, I had no idea! How can they keep it going? You mean, Return of the Children of the Corn etc? Children of the Corn 2? Children of the Corn and the Prisoner of Azkaban? I Know What You Did With The Children Of the Corn???? Yes, it's horrible!!!!
-Some guy on IMDB.com just finding out that there was more than one Children of the Corn movie
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#19 User is offline   Kirby Icon

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Posted 04 May 2005 - 11:16 PM

Firstly, I curse you all for getting all those songs I fondly remember from the movie stuck in my head. *whistles the tune to the one candy room song* DAMNIT!

Secondly, Gene Wilder will always be willy wanka to me, doesn't mean I won't watch the movie, but it does mean I'll be a bit disapointed when I don't see Gene do his rowboat speach.

Thirdly, how will the Ompalumpas work out in this one?

Fourthly, What is it about Jane and creepy stalkers (or Stalkie) on the interweb?

I'll watch it.

This post has been edited by Kirby: 04 May 2005 - 11:26 PM

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#20 User is offline   Voodoo Dog Icon

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Posted 05 May 2005 - 12:16 AM

Last pervy comments I'll ever make, Oh Goddess of this Immortal Realm. But they are CORKERS. That I more or less cut and pasted from other posts of mine. But still, I WROTE THEM!!!!!!!!!!!

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


A POEM ON THE SEXUAL METAPHOR

Sexual metaphors, mexual setaphors, what more can I say?
I metaphor sex, yes I metaphor sex, but she screamed and ran away.

CHA CHA CHA!


A SONG ABOUT THE WONDEROUS CREATURE KNOWN AS JANE SHERWOOD

(Sing to the tune of "Oh Susannah!")

I first beheld your avatar, while strolling through a thread
And when I saw your beauty girl, I thought of you in bed
Now MC's great and Rhubarbs cool, please don't get me wrong
But you make me begin to drool, I had to write this song

Oh dear JANEY! Now come over here for me
I want to bone you now dear girl, feel great as I can be
Oh dear JANEY! Now won't you shag for me?
I want sex right now with you girl, you mean that much to me

DUM DA DAH!

(Please don't think I'm interested merely in your physical appearance dear Janey. You are stunning beautiful, but your radiant personality and sense of humour is even more stunning than that. I would bang you purely for the LEMUR vs puffin thing alone. UP THE LEMURS GODDAMIT!!!!!! Can a puffin use its tail as a novelty toilet brush? Eh? Eh? I DON'T THINK SO!!!!!!

And now, my darling, I leave you to live your life in anyway you see fit. I offer my warmest regards for your future on this earth. Here’s hoping you find your way into a life you find full of happiness, contentment, enlightenment and peace, no matter what direction you choose to take in the course of your delightful adventures ahead.

I will now bother you no more. I will return to my lonely life of staring at pretty girls, too shy to ask them out, and blushing the second they look at me. I'm getting pretty good at it. I should be. I've been practising all my life... *sniff*

*sad violin music plays*
*gunshot*
*thud*
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#21 User is offline   J m HofMarN Icon

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Posted 05 May 2005 - 12:26 AM

Most Americans do not know who ANY author is, aside from, perhaps, Hugh Hefner or Larry Flint, if you consider them authors. However I have a vague idea of what a Roald Dahl is. I read a few of his books in school.

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#22 User is offline   jariten Icon

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Posted 05 May 2005 - 05:58 AM

He's an excellent sjort story writer. Thats his main bread and butter but in the UK hes more popular as a childrens writer-

C an the CF, James and the Giant Peach, B.F.G etc.
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#23 User is offline   SimeSublime Icon

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Posted 05 May 2005 - 07:08 AM

Yeah, he was pretty much drilled as a literary god when I was in primary school. Haven't read any of his books since then. And I have read Charlie and the Great Glass Elevator, or whatever it was called. So long ago though.
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#24 User is offline   looktothesky Icon

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Posted 05 May 2005 - 07:54 AM

I tried reading the second book, but I never got around to finishing it. The original film was amazing, and is one of my all-time favorites.

I'm really looking forward to Burton's remake though, since I love a lot of his other films. biggrin.gif
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#25 User is offline   Slade Icon

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Posted 05 May 2005 - 08:45 AM

I think I read just about book he'd written at one point. I don't actually remember any of them right now since it's been 12 years or so, but yeah, some people know authors!

What about Witches, people? I'm not sure if that was the name of the book, but they made a film about that too, though I didn't like it much. The kid got turned back into a human at the end. Stupid happy endings...
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#26 User is offline   Chefelf Icon

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Posted 05 May 2005 - 08:57 AM

Generally I feel that remakes are rarely necessary. However, since the original movie was based on a book I think it's cool to see another take on the book.

ONe thing that many people forget about the original movie is HOW MUCH FRIGGIN' TIME WAS SPENT NOT IN THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY!!! The beginning was SO BORING. It felt like 2/3 of the movie was spent with Charlie's creepy family that slept in the same bed. I used to just fast forward through that part screaming, "GET ON WITH IT, ALREADY!! GET TO THE PART WHERE WILLIE WONKA PRETENDS TO FALL DOWN THEN DOES A SOMMERSAULT SO THE GOOD STUFF CAN START!!"

At any rate it's hard to disagree with the class Tim Burton/Danny Elfman/Johnny Depp colaboration.
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#27 User is offline   Jane Sherwood Icon

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Posted 05 May 2005 - 11:20 AM

VD: Ok...now I'm just a little scared...

QUOTE
GET TO THE PART WHERE WILLIE WONKA PRETENDS TO FALL DOWN THEN DOES A SOMMERSAULT SO THE GOOD STUFF CAN START!!


Ok, now I want to rewatch that movie, childhood trauma aside, just to see that bit again because I can't remember it!

And the boat ride. I can't believe that never stuck out in my memory!
Check out my crappy drawings!

Chyld is an ignorant slut.

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#28 User is offline   J m HofMarN Icon

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Posted 05 May 2005 - 04:22 PM

VD- Dude, when Jane is too scared to stab something, it means the something in question is fucked up. Or the blob. I didn't read whatever it is you wrote, but I'd be willing to bet it was more fucked up and less blob.

And yeah, I'm definately ok with them doing a new movie based off the book, since it's not technicly a remake. And Johnny Depp is always good, so I'd almost watch it just to see what he does with the role.

Oh, James and the Giant Peace was Dahl? That's where I know him from. That book was what inspired me to comandeer an apple and declare it my pirate ship, before that Jane's ship-hole ate it.

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#29 User is offline   looktothesky Icon

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Posted 05 May 2005 - 08:27 PM

QUOTE (Chefelf @ May 5 2005, 08:57 AM)
It felt like 2/3 of the movie was spent with Charlie's creepy family that slept in the same bed. 


To me, it felt like half of that movie comprised of that 'Cheer Up, Charlie' song. That was the classic fast forward part for me. biggrin.gif
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#30 User is offline   kdogg Icon

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Posted 06 May 2005 - 10:57 AM

It sounds like VD is a Willy Wanker when he thinks about Jane.
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