[SPQR]

Something was wrong with the lead in font. The lead in was blah, bland, and completely void of any pending mystery.

The opening battle scene was an orgy of computer-animated confusion. Why are Lucas and his harem of eunuch nerdanimators hell bent on making the prequels full of technology, design, and effect that only serve to make the originals look like they were made three hundred rather than 30 years ago? it's intergalactic devolution (Nerd excuse- the originals represent a dark age, which is apologist BS).

What the hell are vulture droids?
Then there are heat seeking missiles, and parasitic space droids, and the fighters have chaff, R2 still has the jets and also communicates by cell phone, the jedis' police style utility belt includes grappling guns and O2 regulators, General Grievous, a friggin' robot, has emphysema, (Nerdanimators: well we had 2 sabers, and a dual blade saber, let's give Grievous 4, and he still sucks!)... GRIEVOUS HAS TRIUMPH THE INSULT COMIC DOG"S VOICE AND I CAN PROVE IT- "jedi, i will add your light saber to my collection, for me to poop on!"

All the droids apparently have voice patterns based on a castrati, domesticated ton-ton-esque iguanas that crawl at warp speeds and don't need to bask on a hot rock, the clone army are constantly without helmets, Palpatine gets a bad case of chronic aging from his use of the force, the whole wookie scene is lifted from a game and apparently Chewie and Yoda shared some intimate time together by a lonely frontline camp fire on Kashyyyk, Palpatine can't fight off a lame Windu but battles ninja master Yoda into becoming a cowardly bitch (Nerd excuse-he planned it so that anakin would slay windu and fall to the dark side-nope!), Paplatine's horrible make-up and awful, awful, facial contortions ala Marcel marceu, Dookoo does a brilliantly executed double back gainer from the high platform and then gets his head handed to him 10 seconds later...

Darth Vader appears like an even worse Robert DeNero Frankenstein tearing from his shackles and screaming a deep glottal NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! with a pan out reminiscent of the Stellllaaaaaaaaaaa! scene from A Streetcar, palpatine calls yoda his little green friend, R2 apparently did stand up comedy after his brief stint with the mossad as he appears to be both a humorous extrovert, and an expert in small arms and hand-to-hand combat, 3PO gets his mind wiped but Darth and Obi don't-must have onset Alzheimer’s, grand moff still has chiseled cheekbones and likes to rock the retro uniforms while cruising in his pimped out classic star destroyer, jar jar is still there as a blatant middle finger from Lucas but at least he's silent, Anakin should have been on lithium, or at least zanax, to avoid this whole thing from even starting as he's not seduced but bi-polar with psychotic tendencies, jedis can feel the force, see in the future and reach eternal life but can't overhear clones planning a mutiny...

the script was horrible: from the even more dumbed down droids to the obvious political inuendo-come on the BS "i wrote this over 30 years ago" gambit is up George, "we can rule the galaxy together", "it's my empire", on and on...

Thank God it's over, dead and put to rest...

until another reformated re-release...

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

[Just another wretched fan]

only only reason you're not getting any replies is because everybody agrees. gj.