[BiggSpiffy]

obviously you havent been to clubs...except i wont call them that anymore because it makes me sound too ghetto...there are different "places of entertainment" that play different music, ,just find one that fits your liking (as long as it has a teen night, or you are over 18, but please feel free to use fake ID's)

[floppydisk]

Ok, I'll make a deal with you. If I go to a club with you, you have to go to a rock concert with me. Wait, that sounds like a terribly bad idea. Nevermind.

[BiggSpiffy]

hahaha, i dont think i would last ver long in a maush pit...i might die for "lack of experience"

[floppydisk]

Nonsense, on my first one I bit through my lip. Didn't hurt at all. You just gotta try not to fall down, and you'll be alright. They're bloody fun when you really like the music.

[BiggSpiffy]

ok i guess im up for it...i guess, but dont quote me on that

[Voodoo Dog]

Gar! Please don't hold a conversation like that in here! This is the internet! None of us have social lives and we will all die virgins! Except for you Spiffy! You lucky little bitch! And no, noone hates you here. Nice to see someone who aint a rabid geek show up. You good sir, are the raging yang to our calm yin. SO BOTH OF YOU START TALKING ABOUT PORN OR FUCK OFF!!!

Back on topic...

THE STORY! THE STORY! Please read it and either tell me it blew your socks off or I am an evil pervert who should castrate himself. I can't take the suspense anymore.

This post has been edited by Voodoo dog: 20 May 2005 - 08:55 PM

[floppydisk]

Dude, do you really think you're not a pervert? Everything with you devolves into sex, drugs and alcohol.

Edit: Biggy's really a nerd in the disguise of a jock. He's addicted to Diablo II, and Monster Hunter.

This post has been edited by floppydisk: 20 May 2005 - 08:56 PM

[BiggSpiffy]

ok ok, this is top-secret info, but if you type in quactasitc porn in google search engine it will bring you to a HUGE list of porn movies absolutely free...but you didnt hear it from me

(and dont get the wrong impression of me, im a geek trapped in a jock body, yup thats right i play D&D with the usuall group and i also played magic in 6th through 8th grade)

[Voodoo Dog]

Um...I don't know about you, but when I entered "quacktastic porn" into google, the third site that came up had the following description:

... free quacktastic porn vids. free quacktastic porn vids hardcore asian porn.
child pedo illegal porno. child pedo illegal porno. stephanie mcmahon porn ...

I don't know who Stephanie McMahon is, but I'm betting she hasn't reached puberty yet. Still, the first site listed seems kosher. But be on your guard everyone.

Oh and Spiffy, if you accidently look at something illegal on this thing, please, for the love of GOD, do not ask us if you can get into trouble for it. Read this thread through from the beginning if that happens.

[kdogg]

I don't know who Stephanie McMahon is, but I'm betting she hasn't reached puberty yet. Still, the first site listed seems kosher. But be on your guard everyone.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

She's the daughter of fake wrestling mogul Vince McMahon. Not terribly hot if you ask me.

[BiggSpiffy]

ive started something terrible and i know its gonna come back to haunt me one day

and dont put quotations around the words quacktastic porn, and click the first link...it should say DUCKY PORN, but be warned, i got spyware using this site, and i dont do it anymore...but it is truly not illegal

oh man...what have i gotten myself into

This post has been edited by BiggSpiffy: 21 May 2005 - 08:56 AM

[Slade]

I don't know.

VD: I'm not interested in shaving 'erotic fiction', although "throbbing KITTEN" had me in stitches. Now you see why I moderate like that. And you should do that to a story you like and submit it as part of a Dinner of Leeks! But who cares if you're a pervert, as long as you don't start drooling and masturbating in public? You can like wierd sex stuff if you want to. There are lots of people into BSDM too. Don't be so self-conscious and paranoid about it.

I'm going to make a pervert checklist off of the top of my head.

If you answer yes to any of these questions, there's a good chance you're a pervert.

1. Have you ever slept with or fantasized about sleeping with animals?
2. Do you enjoy molesting men/women/children?
3. Do you stalk women in public and masturbate while spying on them?
4. Do you become sexually aroused by:
showing random people your genitalia?
looking at robots/androids that don't look like people?
viewing other urine?
dead bodies?
looking at amputees or having an amputation done?
hugging trees?
vomiting watching someone vomit?
viewing blood?
looking at nude ducks?

Also, check out this link for more general wierdness.

We've all got are kinks, some are just more kinky than others. (That almost felt like a barendism...) I think the worst part of you, my friend, is that you keep bringing it up over and over again.

And just because your opinion isn't the majority doesn't mean that there's something wrong with it. (I again cite the 2000/2004 US presidental elections.)

[Voodoo Dog]

Having received a PM in the balls from Heccubus entitled "Sexual harrasment", I won't be mentioning my kinks anywhere except here from now on, unless they happen to be on-topic somehow.

Anyhoo...

1. Have you ever slept with or fantasized about sleeping with animals?
Do teddy bears count?

2. Do you enjoy molesting men/women/children?
Nope. But I do enjoy molesting twats who molest men women and children. With a big fuckoff knife. Is that wrong?

3. Do you stalk women in public and masturbate while spying on them?
I'm too shy to even talk to women, let alone stalk them. And I have never spied on a woman on purpose. On purpose. There was an incident concerning my little sweetheart that I'll get round to telling you about later. And yes, I did masturbate to it afterwards. I felt horribly guilty though.

4. Do you become sexually aroused by:
showing random people your genitalia?
Nope, the laughter is too depressing.
looking at robots/androids that don't look like people?
Not unless they're called the PenisSucker 5000 and I'm contemplating my options...
viewing others urine?
No. This makes me want to kill every single person on the planet starting with myself.
dead bodies?
I am not Edgar Allen Poe. Neither am I Elvis.
looking at amputees or having an amputation done?
Brings back too many Nam flashbacks for me to enjoy it.
hugging trees?
No. But this adds to the right wing theories that all hippies are perverts.
vomiting watching someone vomit?
I have to admit, I did enjoy seeing George Bush Sr. do it live on telly. Here's hoping his son will follow in his footsteps.
viewing blood?
Blood freaks me out. Even menstral blood. Especially menstral blood. And the sight of my own blood freaks me out most of all because it reminds me of my own mortality.
looking at nude ducks?
I think ducks are cute, but not in a sexually atrractive way. Why did you specify nude ducks? Have you ever seen one that wasn't? THAT would probably count as a perverted fetish.

[floppydisk]

Hmm... come to think of it, I saw a dead-fish porn picture once. It was a guy having his wang sucked by a fish. Eww....

[Slade]

So it does exist somewhere!