[barend]

and yet strangly compelling...

sentient piece of chewing gum?
sure beats hollywoods, tough guy gets a babysitting job#465
or sequel of remake

[rock_dash]

I think the strangest porno related thing I ever saw was Scooby Doo giving it to Daphne up the backside, while she smiled and poured him dogfood. I think I found it when I was trying to get to the Anime Turnpike and I entered the wrong URL.

But honestly, which of us men haven't imagined having fantastic sex while your partner makes you a sandwich?

...cause, I sure know I haven't. ¬_¬;

[Voodoo Dog]

this is what happened, but how in the hell are you supposed to know if they are 18 and up? that's what im worried about.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

All porn sites have a disclaimer at the beginning thats states you must be a certain age to enter. This is simply so they can't be sued for showing porn to minors. This page should also state that the models are all over the age of 21 or whatever. If it does not say this, do not enter. If you link to a kiddie porn site from another site, the police can't touch you for that. If the contents of the pages linked to by the website are illegal, then this is the legal responsibility of the website. If you're computer is searched, the authorities will be able to tell how you stumbled across the offensive material and so if you follow these rules, you will be completely safe. Except from your parents that is. And now, do please fuck off, theres a good chap. I know this is bitterly ironic, but I think more people here would like to discuss perverted porn than reassure you, even though that was the original purpose of this thread.

[Garth Vader]

there was no disclaimer or anything, i just clicked on a regular porn ad and before I knew it i was on this site called great teens or whatever, it took me straight into it without even knowing.

[rock_dash]

Geez man, you'll be fine. They're not gonna send a judge to your house to rape you with an electric gavel for looking at porn. The only thing I'd worry about is the crap those sites can install on your computer, and your parents finding out. And your parents would get over it eventally, anyway. It's not like they're gonna hate you the rest of your life for looking at porn. Your dad will probably shed a single tear of joy and whisper to himself, "That's my boy."

Edited for spelling.

This post has been edited by rock_dash: 23 April 2005 - 10:47 PM

[Slade]

And contrary to what Voodoo Dog says, your computer does not keep records of how long you've been to what site. If you want to be safe, delete your temporary and offline internet files, trash your history, and your cookies and you'll be fine. Also, most sites don't use underage models because it's illegal and there are enough legal age ones.

Relax and party on, Garth.

[jariten]

Right, its time to get to the true emotional core of this thread.

Was Natalie Portman topless in 'Closer' or what?

[Jordan]

I saw the scene in CLOSER where Padme gives Clive Owen a private dance, so I don't think I need to see Episode Two.
-civillian

You know what was best about that movie? There was no uncomfortable gratuitous sex scenes, yet the movie felt hot and heavy like a penthouse forum.

Aside from the one strip club scene (you still didn't see any skin) the movie was very clean.

The dialog was heavy enough, and well writen and delivered, to make you feel like it was a hardcore movie.

I really liked that film.

[Voodoo Dog]

and yet strangly compelling...

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I'd like to think you said that because you regarded the drama, oddness and originality of the fable refreshing. If however, you sported an erection during some part of the telling, then for the good of humanity, please do the following:

1. Find nice sharp pair of scissors.
2. Remove testicles.
3. Flush down nearest toilet.

I'm sure that after this, you will be capable of living a normal, productive life.

And Slade, I bow to your wisdom, but I'm still pretty sure it would be fairly obvious how long you were on an illegal site. If only the title page is in the memory, you obviously hit the back button the browser as soon as you entered. If about 20 pages are in the memory, you were obviously there for quite a while.

I'm pretty sure if there is no disclaimer, and the content of the site was not apparent in the title, you are held completely unresponsible by the law.
And Garth, regarding the personal message you sent me, sorry dude, but as much as I love you, I'm not looking up the sites you send me the name of to find out whether or not they are illegal. Since this thread started, I have devoted all my time to finding the most bizzare porn available on the net, I have no time for anything else, and since you seem like a normal human being, I severely doubt these places will help you get your rocks off. Oh, and by the way, correct me if I'm wrong, but I kind of got the feeling you're a minor, and I'm pretty sure they can't be prosecuted for this kind of stuff.

Seriously dude, take a valium. If you have been following this thread, you would have noticed that during my adventures on the net, I have run into female desperation porn, s&m and the mind-raping experience known as inflation porn.
If I'm not worried, nobody should be. Masturbate in peace, my friend.

Now to get this thread back on track, I'll mention something else I dug up. I remain at a loss to describe it so I'll just tell you the name and leave the rest to your imaginations.

Menstration porn.

Thank you and good night.

[SimeSublime]

When you mentioned Garth sending you the sites, I got the feeling that this may be just an attempt at spam

Then again, 120 posts implies that you've been here awhile.

[kdogg]

Right, its time to get to the true emotional core of this thread.

Was Natalie Portman topless in 'Closer' or what?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

She wasn't topless in the movie. I think they shot footage of her completely naked but it ended up getting cut out.

[Chyld]

Inflation porn? Well, never let it be said that you've heard everything.

If you want "Somewhat Odd", however, go here, then proceed via Sex to the "Rolodex of Love" (no direct link, just in case Chefelf takes my hangers for it)

The fact that there's names for all the stuff suggests that someone's tried it at some point...

[civilian_number_two]

kdogg, she doesn't get fully topless, at least not from the front. There's other toplessness, from unnamed models, but Portman protected her image ever-so-slightly. Like Jordan said, however, without the full frontal the film is pretty hot, and in fact exactly the way a Penthouse forum is. I don't know why, but Penthouse these days seems rather into stories of cuckolded men (I base this on one mag I came across recently, so I may be extrapolating in error). Is that really working for a lot of guys out there, or just the guys who read Penthouse?

[SimeSublime]

Cuckold is a Wonderful word.

"I arrived home early, She thought that I'd be late
And my girly, wasn't waiting at the gate.
I climbed the stairs, the stairs which I had climbed a hundred times before,
And then, I heard a noise behind the bedroom door.
A slient prayer, escaped my lips as if I knew what was in store...
I...I...I tore the bedsheets off and there she was, with another man,
I looked into her eyes and then I knew...

I was now a cuckold, she cuckolded me.
When you're lovers loving someone else, a cuckold shall you be.

This cuckoldation, has cuckodolised me.
And cuckoldentaly, I'm cuckolded, by her cuckoldity.
Cuckoldish me, life has taken on a cuckoldastic twist,
I should have seen, when I looked at her, she was a cuckoldist.

I am now a cuckold, she cuckolded me *yeah!*
When you're lovers loving someone else, a cuckold shall you be.

Her cuckoldastic tendancies have brought me to my knees.
Oh please, I remenisce on our pre-cuckacious period.
All these cuckoldatory things have made me post-cuckoldic.
I cuck...I feel like such a...cuckhead"
-Tripod.

This post has been edited by SimeSublime: 25 April 2005 - 01:04 AM

[Voodoo Dog]

You might be interested to know of Sigmund Freuds view of fetishes. It was this view that lead me to the conclusion Freud was a barking lunatic. A man will aquire a fetish (woman don't get them in Freuds universe) if he accidently sees his own mother naked as a child. Since the boy probably has no concept of "vagina" he will assume his mothers penis is missing due to it being cut off and will react with horror(even more so than someone seeing their own mother naked, shudder). The boy will look desperately around the room for something to distract his attention from this horrible sight and what ever he decides on will become the object of a future fetish.