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ANGER - Keep it away from the forums. (Warning: Now Contains Pirates)

#1651 User is offline   Ninja Duck Icon

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Posted 07 November 2007 - 09:36 PM

Ashes of Rome, I'll burst him out. After all, I'm just sitting here in the rain.
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#1652 User is offline   J m HofMarN Icon

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Posted 08 November 2007 - 01:40 PM

alright you're on, just let me figure out how to manage this.

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I don't know about you but I have never advocated that homosexuals, for any reason, be cut out of their mother's womb and thrown into a bin.
- Deucaon toes a hard line on gay fetus rights.
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#1653 User is offline   Otal Nimrodi Icon

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Posted 09 November 2007 - 04:51 PM

Alright lads, there be our answer. I got a feelin' in me gut from lookin' at this that Barebones been around. Well, he ain't returnin', but now we at least have a clue. See if'n ye can get the name o' that ship, then next time we get to a port we find where it were headed. Who knows how long she been driftin'?

This post has been edited by Otal Nimrodi: 09 November 2007 - 04:51 PM

Want a Tarot reading?

PM me, we'll talk.
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#1654 User is offline   Bond Icon

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Posted 10 November 2007 - 01:44 PM

QUOTE (J m HofMarN @ Nov 8 2007, 01:40 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
alright you're on, just let me figure out how to manage this.


Manage it well, ye matey; manage it well! wink.gif
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You only live twice:
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And once when you look death in the face.

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#1655 User is offline   J m HofMarN Icon

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Posted 12 November 2007 - 02:00 PM

Ninja Duck- Actually I'm just going to throw a sidequest at you due to a recent development. A man aboard your ship, quite rum drunk and belligerent, pisses you off calling you a two bit pirate. You respond just as drunkenly that you're not only a two bit pirate, you're a doctor of medicine and have your own island. It escalates until you both have 100 doubloons riding on a bet over whether or not this is fact. You wake up the next morning with the usual "Oh shite" as you see a copy of the bet contract. You can either start trying to get a doctoral degree and an island, or begin raising the money to pay off the bet.

Otal- The name of the ship is the Mary Celeste, just cuz I can. And your men can see the tell tale glint of treasures and food left behind if you want to board her. Many of them, despite earlier misgivings in the past, have decided that treasure is treasure and are no longer as scared of the ghost ships of the damned.

Sime- Your fortress is attacked from the side on the jungle by about 200 British sailors, which easily outnumbers its defenders, although if the crew of the ships in the harbor can make it up you'll be looking better. The Brits are trying to storm the fort for some reason but your men hold them back for now and manage to bar the gates.

Barend- Ok, to bring what we said in PM out to the open, you're sneaking about in the jungle on the other side of the fort, but now you notice that the attack has begun. What do you do?

Quote

I don't know about you but I have never advocated that homosexuals, for any reason, be cut out of their mother's womb and thrown into a bin.
- Deucaon toes a hard line on gay fetus rights.
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#1656 User is offline   SimeSublime Icon

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Posted 13 November 2007 - 08:34 AM

"What happened to my sentries? May the Devil take the men who failed their duty to the Lord! This sanctuary of God in this heathen land is being defiled! To arms, men. Load the cannons and batteries, and get me a firing solution. Burn the damn jungle if you must, the sinners must be made to answer for!"

For now I'm going to stay at the fort, but if things start getting too dicey I'm going to make my way to my ship. As it is I want reinforcements to come up from the harbour. Not all the troops, as I still want to hold power down there, but I'd like to not die up here either.

((Bond, count yourself lucky I'm not anywhere near you at the moment, or you would have been instantly killed))
The Green Knight, SimeSublime the Puffinesque, liker of chips and hunter of gnomes.
JM's official press secretary, scientific advisor, diplomat and apparent antagonist?
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#1657 User is offline   Bond Icon

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Posted 13 November 2007 - 09:04 AM

QUOTE (SimeSublime @ Nov 13 2007, 08:34 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
((Bond, count yourself lucky I'm not anywhere near you at the moment, or you would have been instantly killed))


Arrr, I count me lucky stars, I do. biggrin.gif
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#1658 User is offline   Zatoichi Icon

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Posted 13 November 2007 - 02:46 PM

((Yo Ho, I'm finally back and hurrah a new campaign is in order. If my old position is available I'll be takin it up. If not, I'll join the crew of someone else. Tonight I'll finish going through and get myself caught up on all that has occured.))
Apparently writing about JM here is his secret weakness. Muwahaha!!!! Now I have leverage over him and am another step closer towards my goal of world domination.

"And the Evil that was vanquished shall rise anew. Wrapped in the guise of man shall he walk amongst the innocent and Terror shall consume they that dwell upon the Earth. The skies will rain fire. The seas shall become as blood. The righteous shall fall before the wicked! And all creation shall tremble before the burning standards of Hell!" - Mephisto

Kurgan X showed me this web comic done with Legos. It pokes fun at all six Star Wars films and I found it to be extremely entertaining.
<a href="http://www.irregularwebcomic.net/cast/starwars.html" target="_blank">http://www.irregularwebcomic.net/cast/starwars.html</a>
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#1659 User is offline   J m HofMarN Icon

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Posted 13 November 2007 - 02:58 PM

Welcome back Zato, I elected a new Lord Admiral but he's disappeared for a while so maybe something can be worked out. I'll make a post tonight.

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I don't know about you but I have never advocated that homosexuals, for any reason, be cut out of their mother's womb and thrown into a bin.
- Deucaon toes a hard line on gay fetus rights.
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#1660 User is offline   barend Icon

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Posted 13 November 2007 - 05:36 PM

QUOTE (J m HofMarN @ Nov 12 2007, 02:00 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Barend- Ok, to bring what we said in PM out to the open, you're sneaking about in the jungle on the other side of the fort, but now you notice that the attack has begun. What do you do?


((At least bring it out in the open properly.))

((THe plan was to take on the british naval ships while their men are attacking the fort))
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#1661 User is offline   Zatoichi Icon

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Posted 13 November 2007 - 09:07 PM

Well how about this:
After the battle I was justly rewarded for my efforts. Especially with a new, amazingly made sword, and a rifle to match my pistols.

Soon after returning from the battles in the waters near Europe, in the backroom of a brothel, both my wife and one my lieutenants were found dead, and a bullet for each brain. My ivory handled dueling pistols (which I had reported nicked recently) were also found at the scene. Because of my august personage, and the fact that even I under the throes of passion would not be fool enough to leave such evidence, was only placed under house arrest. Soon after my recent house arrest, I was poisoned and hidden away to to a secret place to recover (seeing as how I didn't immediately die from the poison). With the rumors of my disappearance and the appointment of a new Lord Admiral, it is generally assumed that I have died.

After recovering from the poison, I'd like to gather information, get my things back, and begin to resume my responsabilities as an officer of the English navy; either as a captian of one of the ships, or working towards becoming a privateer to give me enough freedom to extract revenge. I'll even resort to becoming a pirate if that's what it takes. Of course it's probably best to find out who I'll be wantin to extract revenge from, and about the recent goings ons. Better see about speaking to Walsingham
Apparently writing about JM here is his secret weakness. Muwahaha!!!! Now I have leverage over him and am another step closer towards my goal of world domination.

"And the Evil that was vanquished shall rise anew. Wrapped in the guise of man shall he walk amongst the innocent and Terror shall consume they that dwell upon the Earth. The skies will rain fire. The seas shall become as blood. The righteous shall fall before the wicked! And all creation shall tremble before the burning standards of Hell!" - Mephisto

Kurgan X showed me this web comic done with Legos. It pokes fun at all six Star Wars films and I found it to be extremely entertaining.
<a href="http://www.irregularwebcomic.net/cast/starwars.html" target="_blank">http://www.irregularwebcomic.net/cast/starwars.html</a>
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#1662 User is offline   J m HofMarN Icon

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Posted 14 November 2007 - 02:47 PM

Sime- Oh, yes, sentries right. Well a good many of them were taken by surprise it seems, no one much expected an assault from the jungles. However you do get word of their relative troop strength and direction. Theres 200 from them and they seem to be coming from the due landward side. Naturally the defenses are a bit weak there since theres nothing for miles on that side but jungle and snakes. Anyhow since the Brits are still in the jungle your cannon fire isnt terribly accurate but a few of them are killed just by luck. Meanwhile British sharpshooters in the woods are starting to fuck up your men as they prepare for the assault. A shot even grazes your honored and sainted shoulder, definiling that perfect limb which god had made for you. Thank the virgin it wasnt on your whipping arm though!

Anyhow your men on the ships are about ready to come up when they spot an odd and decrepit ship sailing quietely off in the distance and heading towards the land. They cant identify any signs of nationality and send the messenger back with about fifty reinforcement troops to ask what they should do.

Barend- Ok youre still out to sea then, and so in that case you can see the glint of a spy glass and it seems a Spanish look out has sighted you. What do you do?

Zatoichi- Ok, youre given a vessel to sail to the mediterranean and rendezvous with the English fleet which is currently striking at a secret Jesuit enclave in Cuba. Walsingham assures you that the jesuits are to blame for your poisoning, and the general of the Jesuit order may be at this enclave. Your ship will arrive in a post or two to help the Brits, but until then feel free to ask any questions or prepare your crew.

Quote

I don't know about you but I have never advocated that homosexuals, for any reason, be cut out of their mother's womb and thrown into a bin.
- Deucaon toes a hard line on gay fetus rights.
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#1663 User is offline   barend Icon

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Posted 14 November 2007 - 04:27 PM

QUOTE (J m HofMarN @ Nov 14 2007, 02:47 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Barend- Ok youre still out to sea then, and so in that case you can see the glint of a spy glass and it seems a Spanish look out has sighted you. What do you do?


((Let them watch me attack the ship that brought the englishmen that are currently attacking them?))
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#1664 User is offline   barend Icon

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Posted 14 November 2007 - 04:28 PM

((and tell them men to be wary, I guess, making a point of the fact that the spaniards know we're here))


[EDIT: I see quick fast replies are no longer assimilated into previous posts. Sorry for the double post all]

This post has been edited by barend: 14 November 2007 - 04:29 PM

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#1665 User is offline   Ninja Duck Icon

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Posted 14 November 2007 - 04:55 PM

QUOTE (J m HofMarN @ Nov 12 2007, 02:00 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Ninja Duck- Actually I'm just going to throw a sidequest at you due to a recent development. A man aboard your ship, quite rum drunk and belligerent, pisses you off calling you a two bit pirate. You respond just as drunkenly that you're not only a two bit pirate, you're a doctor of medicine and have your own island. It escalates until you both have 100 doubloons riding on a bet over whether or not this is fact. You wake up the next morning with the usual "Oh shite" as you see a copy of the bet contract. You can either start trying to get a doctoral degree and an island, or begin raising the money to pay off the bet.


I don't know what godforsaken land this man came from, but where I was born, mothers don't teach their sons to work their backs off just so they can look like an uneducated, unlanded, unloved fool. They don't teach their sons to forge fancy college degrees either, but it's implied.

First order of business is to have a gander at the physician's quarters. I don't want to hurt my pretty self (wenches are wont to complain about bleeding sores) but I reckon I could get some attention by pretending I've caught The Zombie. I decide to hunt down the man who put me up to this and give him a good bite, maybe draw some blood to wet my mouth a little. Won't be nothing a dirty Spaniard isn't used to, eh?
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