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Return of the King

#1 User is offline   Chefelf Icon

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Posted 08 January 2004 - 10:49 AM

While I'm on the subject ...

I'm beginning to root against Return of the King. Why? Because I'm sick of reading the headlines about it!

King Rules the Box Office
King Reigns over Competition
King Returns to Throne of Movies
King Holds Sceptre High Over Other Royal People in Castle
King Viewed as Mere Figurehead by Subjects Yet Still Rules

We get it. The movie has the word "King" in it. Enough!
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Posted 08 January 2004 - 11:15 AM

Heh heh... they said "rules".
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Posted 08 January 2004 - 11:38 AM

QUOTE (Chefelf @ Jan 8 2004, 10:49 AM)
I'm sick of reading the headlines about it!

You forgot: King Sighted in Area Shopping Mall

Wait, that was Elvis. (It is Elvis’s birthday.)
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Posted 08 January 2004 - 12:07 PM

A buddy and I have a private joke referring to the Burger KING commercial when FOTR came out. they were hawKING these "goblets" with a whopper meal, and the announcer kept proclaiming: "BEHOLD". so, naturally we snickered at Moria where Gandalf speaks the word.

PJ example: telephone RINGS, answer, "BEHOLD" (up for a movie?) or,
"Check out our Christmas tree" "Ahh...BEHOLD!"

are there any Burger KING tie-ins this time? (Where the One Ring is Flame Broiled!)
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Posted 08 January 2004 - 01:41 PM

Peter Jackson must be kicking himself because, in retrospect, Return of the Burger King is a much better title for the movie.
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Posted 08 January 2004 - 02:49 PM

There are Pizza Hut/KFC tie-ins this time around.
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Posted 08 January 2004 - 03:14 PM

QUOTE (Despondent @ Jan 8 2004, 12:07 PM)
are there any Burger KING tie-ins this time? (Where the One Ring is Flame Broiled!)

SPOILER!

At the end of the movie the One Ring is flame-broiled.
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Posted 08 January 2004 - 04:06 PM

QUOTE (Chefelf @ Jan 8 2004, 10:49 AM)
I'm beginning to root against Return of the King. Why? Because I'm sick of reading the headlines about it!

You gotta take the bad with the good. That's how headlines get written. I like the text they put on the cover of Maxim and Stuff. Always some horrible single-entendre based on a pun of the actress/model's last name and/or career highlight. Terrible, terrible stuff. The worst of it is every writer doing it either thinks he's clever, or is doing it just because that's the way it's done. "No cold reception for COLD MOUNTAIN;" "Make a date to see CALENDAR GIRLS;" "THE LAST SAMURAI sucks because Tom Cruise is in it;" etc.
"I had a lot of different ideas. At one point, Luke, Leia and Ben were all going to be little people, and we did screen tests to see if we could do that." -George Lucas, in STAR WARS: the Annotated Screenplays (p197).
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Posted 08 January 2004 - 06:51 PM

How about a local sports headline a couple of weeks ago that proudly proclaimed that "TROJANS GET SHAFT." Even my twisted sense of humor couldn't make this up.
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Posted 08 January 2004 - 06:59 PM

Wow, I missed that one. That's pretty bold. However, that probably didn't last three weeks like this damn Return of the King thing.

The whole thing is very tiring.
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Posted 08 January 2004 - 07:53 PM

Latest News!

Chef is cooking up a storm over poorly prepared headlines.
Oh SMEG. What the smeggity smegs has smeggins done? He smeggin killed me. - Lister of Smeg, space bum
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Posted 10 January 2004 - 03:10 PM

"Chef Stewed Over Headlines"?
"Nate No Likey"?
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Posted 11 January 2004 - 05:02 AM

"Too many "KINGS" spoil Chef's broth."
"I had a lot of different ideas. At one point, Luke, Leia and Ben were all going to be little people, and we did screen tests to see if we could do that." -George Lucas, in STAR WARS: the Annotated Screenplays (p197).
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#14 User is offline   Despondent Icon

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Posted 11 January 2004 - 09:37 AM

"the Chef's special
resentment brews
over King" (sighs)
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Posted 15 January 2004 - 09:32 AM

QUOTE (Enhasa @ Jan 8 2004, 03:14 PM)
SPOILER!

At the end of the movie the One Ring is flame-broiled.

If I didn't already read the book and know what happens, I would've severely hurt you... digitally. tongue.gif
PRECIOUS VELIUS....
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