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Hannibal's Favorite American Lies of the right and left wing

#1 User is offline   Hannibal Icon

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Posted 06 December 2004 - 06:56 PM

Top Ten List:


1.George Lucas is a genius and not a plagiarist
2.Adolf Hitler and the Nazis were Christians
3.The Famous picture of Jesus was divinely inspired
4.Che Guevera is a hero
5.Tibetan Tantric Buddhism is the pure dharma path
6.Freemasons are just charitable philanthropists
7.Abraham Lincoln freed the slaves
8.There actually was a Holy Grail
9.Lee Harvey Oswald was the lone assassin
10.The War in Iraq is justifiable because of 9-11

honorable mentions:
-there is no plan to microchip and track the public, collect DNA profiles and Retina scans
-psychedelic drugs are a door to spirituality
-man will one day explore space
-Howard Hughes was an american hero
-there is not and never has been a conspiracy anywhere on earth
-the Pope is an infallible and holy custodian of the religion of Christ
-Buddhists don't believe in good or evil, demons or possession
-Wicca is a religion that can be traced to the Druids
-Halliburton does not employ mercenaries
-the CIA was not founded by ex-nazis
-Watson, Crick, Wagner, Jung and Joseph Campbell were not antisemitic
-the KKK was not founded by the Freemasons, or Albert Pike
-the Knights Templar were not responsible for the Holy Wars or the Crusades

This post has been edited by Hannibal: 06 December 2004 - 07:04 PM

"Anyone who has the power to make you believe absurdities also has the power to make you commit atrocities."
~ Voltaire (1694-1778)


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Posted 06 December 2004 - 11:08 PM

Nice succinct post. Why don't you list your favorite truths?
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Posted 07 December 2004 - 01:17 AM

Will anyone explain to me what are the justification to these "lies"? I must be missing something, not being American.

Particularly that some of these issues are not easily black-white questions of simple truth-false resolution - in fact the majority of them.

IMHO, putting them like that is a gross simplification.
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Posted 07 December 2004 - 01:58 AM

I have a deep fascination in the Templars, and a nearby cemetary has, literally, DOZENS of gravestones with Templar and Free Mason logos. It's actually kind of creepy...
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#5 User is offline   Jordan Icon

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Posted 07 December 2004 - 02:20 AM

The Templars conquered Jerusalem for a couple of years or so. Maybe 10, I don't remember. They eventually got their asses kicked by muslims. I think they tried one more time to retake the holy land but failed.

In short, they looted the place, held fast for a small amount of time, and then had to leave because daggers were flying at their heads.

Wizard and Dungeon games portray Templar as holy knights with healing abilities. Personally, I think snake and dragon gamers just liked the name "templar" and used it.
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#6 User is offline   Hannibal Icon

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Posted 07 December 2004 - 02:52 AM

knights templar: still destroying cultures since the 1st Crusade:
http://www.kingmere..../DCA/dca01.html

This post has been edited by Hannibal: 07 December 2004 - 02:53 AM

"Anyone who has the power to make you believe absurdities also has the power to make you commit atrocities."
~ Voltaire (1694-1778)


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Posted 07 December 2004 - 03:26 AM

QUOTE (Jordan @ Dec 7 2004, 02:20 AM)
Wizard and Dungeon games portray Templar as holy knights with healing abilities.  Personally, I think snake and dragon gamers just liked the name "templar" and used it.

See also: Starcraft.
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#8 User is offline   Jane Sherwood Icon

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Posted 07 December 2004 - 03:43 PM

Look, what the hell is the deal with the Freemasons, already?! I know and have seen several men who are Masons (judging by that signet ring I've seen them wear) all being pretty regular blue-collar looking guys, I've seen about five or six lodges around here (most in tiny little pissant backwater towns), and from what I've heard my grandfathers were both rather high-ranking Masons. Yet all I ever hear about is how they're some corrupt, elitists, secret organization linked to all kinds of conspiracies.

Am I missing something here? What's the story?
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Posted 07 December 2004 - 07:47 PM

Jane - Not a clue. I think one of my uncles is a Mason though... They might just get off on being esoteric...

There's only one surefire way to answer those accusations posed by Hannibal:



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Ms. Corvax - You're not missing anything. That's just Hannibal, and what makes him so charming/annoying, depending on your perceptions.

Everybody who's anybody knows the main issue during the United States' Civil War was not slavery, it was state's rights versus the federal government's rights. The South and North posessed very different ideas as to how their states should be run, and for some reason or other, they couldn't seperate the states into various jurisdictions, each with their own state specific rules. Slavery was one issue. Tarrifs were another. When the North's power outweighed the South's due to new states being created, South Carolina said "Fuck you, Washington, we're starting our own union, and we'll do it better than you, so there!" And the executive branch said "No fucking way, man. You do that and we'll kick your asses. We're going to be one big happy family if we have to kill all of you." And then everybody started fighting. Brothers fighting brothers, hamsters fighting pidgeon-rats, babies fighting babies. And then the North won and all the states were let back into the union.

Interesting fact: The Emancipation Proclimation did not actually free any slaves, since the states it was in effect for were those that had ceeded from the Union and so Abe couldn't really tell them what to do. Is that what you were getting at, H-unit, ole' bean?
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Posted 07 December 2004 - 07:55 PM

Hurray! Wikipedia to the rescue.

'http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Freemasonry

They are a big exclusive frat that likes secret handshakes and is united under the belief of a deliberately ambiguous Supreme Being. They may or may not rule the world.

Of course, we do know the Stonecutters are holding back the electric car and keeping Atlantis off the maps.
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Posted 07 December 2004 - 07:55 PM

This was a duplicate post for some reason, but allows me to make one final little point... Edit: And then end up rambling on.

In regards to Tantric Buddhism, you can't go around declaring philosophical and theological circles "lies". It makes no sense. It would be like me saying "Not eating meat is blasphemy towards our biscupids." Or something equally absurd.

Favorite truths:
- There is no Dana, only Zoul.
- Mr. Momomoto, famous Japanese, can swallow his nose.
- The opposite of truth is a lie, The opposite of Truth is also true.
- Typing in 'man woman' in a unix system will inevitably destroy the entire build. (Ok, that's not a truth, just some geek humor.)
- My psychology teacher is insane.
- Big Brother is watching you.
- King Kong died for your sins.
- Nixon was a crook, but so is every other politician out there.
- The tyrant will always find a pretext for his tyranny.
- There is no truth like an Orwellian truth.

This post has been edited by Slade: 07 December 2004 - 08:20 PM

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Posted 07 December 2004 - 08:08 PM

To say that Slavery was not the issue over which the US Civil War was fought is like saying the current War in Iraq is not about Terrorism.

Before anyone posts a rebuttal, please, think about that.

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Posted 07 December 2004 - 08:16 PM

QUOTE (Slade @ Dec 8 2004, 12:55 AM)
They are a big exclusive frat that likes secret handshakes and is united under the belief of a deliberately ambiguous Supreme Being. They may or may not rule the world.

Of course, we do know the Stonecutters are holding back the electric car and keeping Atlantis off the maps.


There's no use in pretending they "may or may not". The UN HQ is decorated with Masonic symbols. See that eye on the back of the George Washington Dollar? That's the Masons. Watching you.

If it's any comfort, the Masons will never control the Oscars (the Stonecutters rig every Oscar night).
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Posted 07 December 2004 - 08:24 PM

No, I meant that it was one part of a larger issue, not that it wasn't an issue.

Edit: I saw National Treasure too. Poor boromir, can't get a break.

This post has been edited by Slade: 07 December 2004 - 08:25 PM

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