[J m HofMarN]

Haha! Most excellent then, hopefully most will just pass over all the elven names and never realize it until they reach the little appendix I intend to put at the end of the book. Actually its "third eye blind"

[SimeSublime]

Ahh, I was thinking there dib lined or something.

This post has been edited by SimeSublime: 11 February 2005 - 06:11 AM

[J m HofMarN]

A hell of a week it has been, but there shall be a chapter written 'pon the morrow.

[SimeSublime]

No problem, I've been locked in KotOR, which takes up a lot of my forum time.

[J m HofMarN]

Chapter twenty three: A house of a whale.

Having found the hidden ports we eventually gained passage on a ship by procuring a watermelon and giving it to a vendor who then gave us an ancient sword which we gave to its owners grandson, in return for which he gave us some after dinner mints, which we then sold to some local children in exchange for a dime bag, which we then sold to a drug dealer in exchange for some rufies which we used to drug the ships guard.

Randylyl murmured in his disease ridden torpor that we could have just bought the drugs and Phil looked down to him, pitying the fevered madness into which our friend had descended and setting a damp rag on his head as the ship tossed about over the seas.

Well naturally the ship sank and we were eaten by a whale. Of course it only ate us after it ravaged eached of us, but of course we took it in good stride as random eating/ravishings are frequent occurences on the high seas.

We all came up in the whales stomach and sat around for a while wondering what we might do to escape. Suddenly and without any warning a little fellow appeared before us, looking us over.

"Right. So how will you be paying your rent?" She asked shrewdly.

"What?" I demanded in amazement as Phil and the others echoed my sentiments.

"Well you are residing inside my whale, aren't you?" She asked.

"Not by our intentions!" Phil pointed out.

"Well yer still here!" She stated testily. "And this is my whale."

"Do you have a deed for the whale issued by the local king?" Asked Zorbilliam.

"Of course not. I am the local ruler because I've been here the longest and I get to tax anyone who sets foot in my whale." She said, confident in her superiority.

"And precisely how long have you been here?" I asked curiously.

"Why since the begining of the world of course." She said.

"You mean since Tuesday?" I asked. "Thats barely even a week!"

"Does the whale agree to this relationship?" Phil followed up.

"I should think so! We're still here, aren't we?" Asked the woman curtly.

"Alright alright how much do we have to pay?" I inquired.

"Pay what?" She asked, puzzled.

"How much do we have to pay for rent?" I said patiently.

"I hadn't thought of that. The whale and I have never had tenants before. What does a room in a whale go for these days anyhow?" She said in her rather shrill voice.

"Well to decide that we'd need to hire a professional whale inspector to look into any problems, such as the problem of being in a whales stomach." I pointed out.

"Well I suppose we'd better drop you off then. Come right back as soon as you find a whale inspector for hire." We felt a lurch as the whale beached itself and smiled to eachother.

"Oh, by the way." I added as we passed out of the whales mouth as it gaped and struggled to breathe. "We're adventurers, we don't pay for anything!" I laughed and grabbed up a clay pot, smashing it on our way out onto the beach.

"Oh! Adventurers! Have fun then, thanks for not ravaging me." She said cheerily as she waved to us from the mouth of the dying whale.

Mindless of our would be land lady we walked up the beach towards a city that S.W. recognized as Rosmundar. Little did we know that we were about to undertake a great quest.

This post has been edited by J m HofMarN: 16 February 2005 - 12:11 AM

[SimeSublime]

I like the references back to the start. Good old Link and his pots. Not to mention the piss-take on adventure games.

[Just your average movie goer]

Another delightful chapter, JM. Glamis always brings a smile on my face.

And

"Oh! Adventurers! Have fun then, thanks for not ravaging me."

I loved that.

[J m HofMarN]

hey, you guys know there'd be a lot more chapters if there were more people offering reviews. Just a thought. I think I'm going to start book 2 of hte Glamis series as a new topic.

[Just your average movie goer]

Yep, I know all about underappreciated genius. Welcome to my world.

[J m HofMarN]

To those few of you that have posted I send my highest thanks, especially to you Movie Goer and Sime, I was just hoping that maybe some people were just reading and not commenting.

[Chyld]

Oh hell yes! Just that I feel inadequate just going "Yep... fucking quality, JM. As always..."

[J m HofMarN]

Really the best thing you can do in anything in the screening room (I'm sure Barend and JYAMG will back me with this) is first to contribute money to us, cuz these don't come free.

Haha had you scared for a second there, no. Actually when you write your reply just pick your favorite line or favorite lines and quote them, that way we know we've done something you like and we can do more stuff like it.

[SimeSublime]

Yeah, I sometimes don't reply due to the fact that I say I love every chapter, because I do, but then I remember that on the off chance that I've posted something on the net(like the guest update I did for you, Chyld)and nobody comments on it, I get quite depressed. For those of you who haven't seen it, it's the bit about bouncy castles here:
http://www.less-is-m...0105_250105.php

Hey, a plug for both myself and Chyld. Now that's multitasking.

[Chyld]

Devoius cunning, Mr Sime,

*passes a bag of money under the table*

[Slade]

Heh, keep up the great work, JM. You had me chuckling!