Crunchy or Smooth The debate of the century
#1
Posted 31 October 2004 - 02:28 AM
I thought that since the presidential contest is essentially between two old white christian rich guys that we should have a similiarly pointless and yet spirited debate. So, America, make your choice between two spreadable peanut produced protein containing confections.
Decision 2004: Crunchy or Smooth
Decision 2004: Crunchy or Smooth
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I don't know about you but I have never advocated that homosexuals, for any reason, be cut out of their mother's womb and thrown into a bin.
#2
Posted 31 October 2004 - 02:31 AM
I myself am in favor of crunchy peanut butter. Only crunchy peanut butter can defend our country from terrorism because it has little chunks of peanut in it that terrorists might chip their teeth on, thus keeping them from driving planes into buildings. Crunchy also tastes better and has more consistency.
Quote
I don't know about you but I have never advocated that homosexuals, for any reason, be cut out of their mother's womb and thrown into a bin.
#4
Posted 31 October 2004 - 08:02 AM
I stand for the abolition of all peanunt butter. Its smell alone can cause me to dry retch, obviously posing as a threat to our security. All peanunt butter must be destroyed lest the terrorists overwhelm us all!
This post has been edited by SimeSublime: 31 October 2004 - 08:02 AM
The Green Knight, SimeSublime the Puffinesque, liker of chips and hunter of gnomes.
JM's official press secretary, scientific advisor, diplomat and apparent antagonist?
JM's official press secretary, scientific advisor, diplomat and apparent antagonist?
#7
Posted 31 October 2004 - 01:50 PM
Hear, Hear, EP!
I'm going to have to straddle the fence on this one. I can be a Voter that can't make up my mind, right?
__
the third party candidates:
Koogle. Does anyone remember That? Is there anything akin to that on the shelf today? There's some milky way stuff I haven't gone near. And didn't Kobe Bryant represent some other product I haven't tried? Nutella?
I flipped through some fifty year old magazines recently. Peter Pan, the mascot was female. Wonder how that went down.
I'm going to have to straddle the fence on this one. I can be a Voter that can't make up my mind, right?
__
the third party candidates:
Koogle. Does anyone remember That? Is there anything akin to that on the shelf today? There's some milky way stuff I haven't gone near. And didn't Kobe Bryant represent some other product I haven't tried? Nutella?
I flipped through some fifty year old magazines recently. Peter Pan, the mascot was female. Wonder how that went down.
#9
Posted 31 October 2004 - 04:22 PM
People, remember, if you vote for a third party candidate such as Nutella, you risk letting Smooth peanut butter win and clearly that cannot be, for crunchy must triumph.
Quote
I don't know about you but I have never advocated that homosexuals, for any reason, be cut out of their mother's womb and thrown into a bin.
#11
Posted 31 October 2004 - 09:19 PM
Mother fuck. I won't allow smooth to be crushed with humilating deafeat! I stand tall in my support of Smooth Peanut Butter! It's all a matter of using it in a way best befitting of it's lack of nuts.
I guess i just don't like chunks of shit in my food. I hate bits of junk in my ice cream; i hate seven grain bread becuase the crappy grains detract from an otherwise perfect slice of fluffy goodness, and so forth (with exceptions, i assure you).
I'm obviously never going to convince anyone, but that isn't my intention. I just want to lend SmoothPB my support. Fight on , brutha!
I guess i just don't like chunks of shit in my food. I hate bits of junk in my ice cream; i hate seven grain bread becuase the crappy grains detract from an otherwise perfect slice of fluffy goodness, and so forth (with exceptions, i assure you).
I'm obviously never going to convince anyone, but that isn't my intention. I just want to lend SmoothPB my support. Fight on , brutha!
"Nothing is real, all is permitted"
- Hassan i Sabbah
"There's nothing wrong with anything."
- Philip J.Fry
- Hassan i Sabbah
"There's nothing wrong with anything."
- Philip J.Fry
#13
Posted 01 November 2004 - 11:11 PM
Thanks to all who participated in this argument, I just want to state yet again that (though I am strongly in favor of crunchy) I really just wanted this to show how silly it is to think that there's a choice when you're essentially faced with minor variations of the same product (IE chunks of peanut vs no chunks of peanut or Rich catholic white man versus rich baptist white man)
Quote
I don't know about you but I have never advocated that homosexuals, for any reason, be cut out of their mother's womb and thrown into a bin.