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movies you shouldn't see look at the title

#1 User is offline   sinister grinner Icon

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Posted 27 September 2004 - 10:23 PM

just some movies i can think of right now that you SHOULD NOT SEE.

red water
epoch evolution

epoch: evolution is so terrible that if you knew how bad it was without actually seeing it, then not seeing it ever would make you infinitely more wise. if anyone has seen it, you'll know what im talking about.
Thirteen and a half.
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and half a chance.
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#2 User is offline   Jordan Icon

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Posted 22 October 2004 - 07:24 PM

Day After Tommorrow
Van Helsing
Envy
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Taking Lives


All the above are a waste of your money and time.
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#3 User is offline   Just your average movie goer Icon

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Posted 22 October 2004 - 08:23 PM

In no particular order -

Con Air
Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom (see here)
Thunderball
Live And Let Die
The Man With The Golden Gun
The Spy Who Loved Me
Licence To Kill
The World Is Not Enough
Die Another Day
(wow... most of the Bond movies, I guess. And probably Moonraker, although I haven't seen it for myself).
The Water Boy
Big Daddy
(or any other Adam Sandler film, with the exception of The Wedding Singer)
The Life of David Gale (what pretentious shit, trying to disguise itself as intelligent. It's also highly unpleasant viewing)
Ben Hurr (yes, it starts well but look at that hour long anticlimax - this ruins the film).
The Blood Waters of Dr Z. (saw this through the lense of MST3K - even then, it was unbearable).

There's probably a fair few more out there. I just can't remember them right now.
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#4 User is offline   Vwing Icon

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Posted 22 October 2004 - 08:43 PM

Jeez, am I the only one who liked Day After Tomorrow? Silly? Yes. Dazzling? Definitely, and that was worth the price of admission for me.

Anyway, here goes.

Mars Attacks

Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo (and I'm assuming any other Rob Schneider pic)

Raising Helen

Unbreakable - so much potential, so much disappointment

Lost In Translation - Maybe because I've never experienced anything like that, I didn't like it. I got what she was going for, but I don't think I grokked it. I still attribute the fault to her, however, for I was entertained by about 5 minutes of the movie. I like to describe it as a student film that should have received an A+, but was not a movie.

The Time Machine (2002 version, original is very good) - Starts off looking like it'll top the original and be a fabulous sci-fi/time travel movie. Ends up being a good-looking nothing, with Jeremy Irons spewing some philosophy in a speech that seems it was added because the filmmakers forgot where they were going with the movie, and wanted to remind themselves and the audience. Very disappointing.

Hollow Man - You can't do a tragic and suspenseful invisible man story if the character is already an asshole to being with! Bacon is good as always, but he's wasted on a movie with shallow, generic characters that follows basic suspense movie patterns, and could have been a really compelling story. Very good effects, though.

Pay it Forward's ending - I really liked the movie until the ending. I won't spoil it for anyone who hasn't seen, but suffice it to say the movie could have been the greatest movie of all time, and I think the ending spoils it.

That's all I can think of right now.
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#5 User is offline   Vwing Icon

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Posted 22 October 2004 - 09:05 PM

Ah no edit button. I was going to add about the Day After Tomorrow that it actually stole a movie I had thought of (and had begun to write a script for) about a year before I even heard of it. It's actually not a great story, but I liked it.

It was going to be set in the future, where basically Earth is like San Francisco. In order to keep up with growing energy demands there is a seemingly endless sea of factories, and people are forced to live much of their lives underground. In a last-ditch effort to solve the pollution problem, the governments of the world agree to set up a supercomputer which would be able, through a series of satellites and other future technology that I hadn't thought of when I thought of the idea smile.gif, to control the weather of the world. It is given distinct instructions to "eliminate the primary source of pollution." That source would be humanity, and it sets about using its powers of weather to do that (sound familiar?)

And DAT literally stole my last scene. The last scene would be after the machine is destroyed by a former cop who overcomes an environmental terrorist who is so concerned with the environment that he protects the machine at all costs, happier with humans eradicated and a clean environment. In the following I will parallel the last scene of DAT with the last scene of my movie. My movie is being described, with the words in parentheses showing how it was subtly changed in DAT.

Humans come to the surface (rooftops) after living so long in fear of the weather underground (in buildings). Calmer weather is shown, as the people look up at the sky to examine it, and different reaction shots are shown. Finally, the camera zooms out from the people on earth to a wider view of thousands of people, then up more until we see the countries, the world, and finally, a shot of the earth suspended in space, finally calm and clean.

Notice how I used only 2 parentheses. Notice how the themes of both movies are basically the same. Notice how DAT made a shitload of money at the box office. Realize how pissed I was I didn't think of this idea sooner, or else I'd be in a mansion somehwere right now sad.gif. So basically, I liked DAT because much of it was my movie. And I thought the ending was just brilliant writing smile.gif

This post has been edited by Vwing: 22 October 2004 - 09:06 PM

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#6 User is offline   SimeSublime Icon

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Posted 23 October 2004 - 02:38 AM

I liked Con Air, Van Helsing, and a few of the Adam Sandler movies. The key is to walk in there not expecting a serious movie.
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#7 User is offline   srmoore Icon

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Posted 23 October 2004 - 10:14 AM

hrm.. with the exception of sinister grinner's post.. I liked many of the movies mentioned.

But I am weird when it comes to films.
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#8 User is offline   Just your average movie goer Icon

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Posted 23 October 2004 - 10:21 AM

Sime, Smoore!

What's wrong with you? These movies were awful!

I'll excuse you for now. But try to improve your movie tastes in future.


Okay, I just thought of another one -

Twister.

Now THAT was crap.

This post has been edited by Just your average movie goer: 23 October 2004 - 10:22 AM

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#9 User is offline   looktothesky Icon

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Posted 23 October 2004 - 10:48 AM

QUOTE (SimeSublime @ Oct 23 2004, 02:38 AM)
The key is to walk in there not expecting a serious movie.

I back this up 100%!
People who walk into a movie, always expecting something serious / poetic / or displays a message conveying society and that... are very boring people in my book...

wub.gif
PRECIOUS VELIUS....
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#10 User is offline   Just your average movie goer Icon

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Posted 23 October 2004 - 11:05 AM

What about people who walk into a movie expecting something that is entertaining enough to warrant the price of admission?
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#11 User is offline   SimeSublime Icon

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Posted 23 October 2004 - 11:15 AM

Depends how you look at it. Twister was a load of shit and no amount of optimism could possibly make it worth a rewatch, but Van Helsing was a fun excursion with flashy fight scenes. I happen to like gothic horror/action combinations, so I thought it was fun(note that I wouldn't say it was good though). And hey, the upside is that when I saw Underworld, it was so above and beyond what I was expecting that I loved it all the more.
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#12 User is offline   Just your average movie goer Icon

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Posted 23 October 2004 - 11:26 AM

Well, I can't comment on either of those films. But if I should ever see them, I'll let you know what I think.
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#13 User is offline   SimeSublime Icon

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Posted 23 October 2004 - 11:44 AM

Well, like I said, don't expect to take VH seriously and you should enjoy it. Underworld, though, is quite a good movie in it's own right.

And I saw Con-Air and Adam Sandler movies on TV, so the price was non-existant. Even so, I still thought they were neat.

This post has been edited by SimeSublime: 23 October 2004 - 11:44 AM

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#14 User is offline   Jordan Icon

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Posted 23 October 2004 - 06:00 PM

Van Helsing is terrible. Go read the abridged script version for a laugh.

www.ter.air0day.com
Oh SMEG. What the smeggity smegs has smeggins done? He smeggin killed me. - Lister of Smeg, space bum
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#15 User is offline   Just your average movie goer Icon

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Posted 23 October 2004 - 10:46 PM

Ah, you've gotta love The Editing Room.


And Sime, I will reiterate on this again, just in case anyone doesn't realise ->

Con Air is BAD.
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