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MGS4: Cutscenes of the Patriots Oh fine I guess I'll start the topic then

#1 User is offline   joshofalltrades Icon

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Posted 25 June 2008 - 02:35 PM

Since apparently nobody else wants to do it, there. I've started the topic for you.

You know you want to go watch it.

I didn't even really need to watch this one since every MGS starting with the second one has been the same cutscene diarrhea sandwiched between crappy boss fight and oversimplified stealth gameplay bread. It was funny nonetheless.
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#2 User is offline   Game Over Icon

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Posted 26 June 2008 - 01:52 AM

The most honest and fair one in my opinion. Don't get me wrong, its pretty impressively sexy looking game, but you know the extras that come with a MGS game. I kinda stopped thinking and playing them just like the Resident Evil series. It became pretty monotonous.

Now that I am in a good mood today, I'll be quoting:

"I totally forgot Nintendo named a console after a bodily fluid and it funny now that we can hear the words 'Solid Snake' without picturing the throbbingly powerful erections you get from wearing skin tight combat suits while hanging out with women who never do their shirts on properly."
"I'm going to account as much as the story as I can before my brain starts to hurt; Solid Snake is a cloned mercenary who suffers from premature aging due to a [oh God, what is he talking about?] of Microsoft. He lives with his support character and 'best friend', Otacon, and the two of them have adopted a child together. That oozing sound you just heard was made by all the world's homo erotic fan fiction writers simultaneously emitting torrents of hot lady's puck."
"OH CHRIST, this shit is bananas."

More quote coming soon since its a weird fetish I have (not really).
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#3 User is offline   TheOrator Icon

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Posted 26 June 2008 - 02:01 AM

QUOTE (Game Over @ Jun 26 2008, 01:52 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
"Solid Snake is a cloned mercenary who suffers from premature aging due to a [oh God, what is he talking about?] of Microsoft."


"due to a planned obsolescence worthy of Microsoft." He's saying they seem to have accelerated his aging because they planned on coming out with something better soon (I assume, having never played any of the games), which is just as good as the times Microsoft has done the same thing.

And "hot lady's puck" was "hot lady-spunk."


Well I sounded like goddamn Data right there.


Pretty good video, in all.

EDIT: Accidentally quoted too much. Added the bit about Data.

This post has been edited by TheOrator: 26 June 2008 - 02:03 AM

"I've come here to chew bubble gum and kick ass. And I'm all out of bubble gum."
-John Carpenter's They Live

"God help us...in the future."
-Plan 9 from Outer Space


nooooo
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#4 User is offline   Game Over Icon

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Posted 26 June 2008 - 02:07 AM

Thanks for the clarification.

Youtube has millions of videos on MGS with tons of walkthroughs. Watch them in case you don't want to buy the games.

This post has been edited by Game Over: 26 June 2008 - 02:07 AM

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#5 User is offline   David-kyo Icon

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Posted 26 June 2008 - 02:28 AM

QUOTE (Game Over @ Jun 26 2008, 09:07 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Thanks for the clarification.

Youtube has millions of videos on MGS with tons of walkthroughs. Watch them in case you don't want to buy the games.

I don't want to buy the games, and I couldn't care less about the walkthrough videos either. The first game seemed alright (apart from the clunky controls), played with it for about two hours. But if they indeed pulled the same shit off three more times adding more and more of the aforementioned annoying tidbits, then they ought to... adopt a pet basilisk.
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#6 User is offline   Thaluikhain Icon

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Posted 26 June 2008 - 02:59 AM

Is there anyone else that has part of them insist that the MGS games were merely cashing in on an amusing webcomic and not the other way round or is it jut me?


But oooh...feel the hatred in this review.
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#7 User is offline   z e w b Icon

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Posted 26 June 2008 - 02:42 PM

Splinter Cell was always the superior stealth espionage game. And even though Sam Fisher stole my hairstyle, I am still going to play the new one when it comes out.
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#8 User is offline   Game Over Icon

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Posted 26 June 2008 - 08:38 PM

QUOTE (z e w b @ Jun 26 2008, 08:42 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Splinter Cell was always the superior stealth espionage game. And even though Sam Fisher stole my hairstyle, I am still going to play the new one when it comes out.


http://www.youtube.c...h?v=1-BpJMNxDbk
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#9 User is offline   TheOrator Icon

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Posted 26 June 2008 - 09:27 PM

QUOTE (Game Over @ Jun 26 2008, 08:38 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>


Someone should tell that man that he doesn't need to pretend to be an idiot because there are enough already. He's too over-the-top anyway.
"I've come here to chew bubble gum and kick ass. And I'm all out of bubble gum."
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nooooo
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#10 User is offline   setasouji Icon

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Posted 27 June 2008 - 12:32 AM

Part of me is convinced that Hideo Kojima is purposefully making each successive Metal Gear game more and more completely bonkers because he was forced into it and decided he might as well have some fun and see if he could make the game so crazy people would stop buying it. But Metal Gear Solid 3 was pretty tame compared to MGS2; I mean, it only had raging homoeroticism and a man who shot bees out of a grenade launcher. So I guess that theory doesn't really pan out.
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#11 User is offline   z e w b Icon

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Posted 27 June 2008 - 04:15 PM

There's really nothing unusual about how bad the plot is in MGS4. The series has basically had a poorly-written story that gets progressively worse with each sequel as Kojima creates plot holes, and then tries to fix them and only creates more.
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#12 User is offline   Game Over Icon

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Posted 28 June 2008 - 12:19 PM

I personally think that Kojima views war as a bedroom fantasy story which he used to make up as a kid.

I can see that his visit to numerous army camps in order to get real life battle experience has not helped.

Dear Mr. Kojima:

Krav Mega fighting moves and words don't make a good storyline.

QUOTE (TheOrator @ Jun 27 2008, 03:27 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Someone should tell that man that he doesn't need to pretend to be an idiot because there are enough already. He's too over-the-top anyway.


So, I heard yu liek satire.
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#13 User is offline   Deucaon Icon

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Posted 29 June 2008 - 08:10 AM

Video isn't working and I cant be assed downloading latest Firefox patch so I will assume that Yahtzee is just bitching about MGS4 because he is payed to bitch about MGS4.
"I felt insulted until I realized that the people trying to mock me were the same intellectual titans who claimed that people would be thrown out of skyscrapers and feudalism would be re-institutionalized if service cartels don't keep getting political favors and regulations are cut down to only a few thousand pages worth, that being able to take a walk in the park is worth driving your nation's economy into the ground, that sexual orientation is a choice that can be changed at a whim, that problems caused by having institutions can be solved by introducing more institutions or strengthening the existing ones that are causing the problems, and many more profound pearls of wisdom. I no longer feel insulted because I now feel grateful for being alive and witnessing such deep conclusions from my fellows."
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#14 User is offline   Ghello Icon

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Posted 29 June 2008 - 08:38 AM

QUOTE (setasouji @ Jun 27 2008, 12:32 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Part of me is convinced that Hideo Kojima is purposefully making each successive Metal Gear game more and more completely bonkers because he was forced into it and decided he might as well have some fun and see if he could make the game so crazy people would stop buying it. But Metal Gear Solid 3 was pretty tame compared to MGS2; I mean, it only had raging homoeroticism and a man who shot bees out of a grenade launcher. So I guess that theory doesn't really pan out.


He was recieving death threats from fans to make a new one, probably why he decided to kill him off.
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#15 User is offline   Kurtt Reigo Icon

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Posted 29 June 2008 - 01:35 PM

QUOTE (Game Over @ Jun 26 2008, 12:52 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
The most honest and fair one in my opinion. Don't get me wrong, its pretty impressively sexy looking game, but you know the extras that come with a MGS game. I kinda stopped thinking and playing them just like the Resident Evil series. It became pretty monotonous.

Now that I am in a good mood today, I'll be quoting:

"I totally forgot Nintendo named a console after a bodily fluid and it funny now that we can hear the words 'Solid Snake' without picturing the throbbingly powerful erections you get from wearing skin tight combat suits while hanging out with women who never do their shirts on properly."
"I'm going to account as much as the story as I can before my brain starts to hurt; Solid Snake is a cloned mercenary who suffers from premature aging due to a [oh God, what is he talking about?] of Microsoft. He lives with his support character and 'best friend', Otacon, and the two of them have adopted a child together. That oozing sound you just heard was made by all the world's homo erotic fan fiction writers simultaneously emitting torrents of hot lady's puck."
"OH CHRIST, this shit is bananas."

More quote coming soon since its a weird fetish I have (not really).


ugh, Snakes mustache is soo gross. definately not sexy. mgs1 was awesome, but i thought it knew it was silly. then mgs2 followed that stupid pansey raiden. but youre right, yahtzee was very fair. i like it best when his criticizm is balenced like this. i like teh mix of funny and mean comments and actuall , and you quoted my favorite lines fromi t, too! wii is the STUPIDEST name ever

"So, I heard yu liek satire." lol u herd rite!

"Splinter Cell was always the superior stealth espionage game." no, it was moer like trying to play a generic tom clancey novel. very dull and linear, boooooring. i prefer the silliness of mgs to generic 3rd world terrorists trying to blow up americas freedom

"Video isn't working and I cant be assed downloading latest Firefox patch so I will assume that Yahtzee is just bitching about MGS4 because he is payed to bitch about MGS4." sad.gif yuo should watch it. it's sooooo funny! yahtzee gets paid, but you can tell when hez hearts not in it, and he wanted to review this one!




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